Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

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A narwhall walks into a store and asks the cashier where he keeps the soap products. The cashier does not speak english.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? People that make dead baby jokes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

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what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

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School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

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What's the reason my dog died? I ate him.

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What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

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Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely and should probably go to the hospital.

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The adventures of Helen Keller:

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This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

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Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

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Is your refrigerator running? No.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. Oh, OK I'll be there in a sec. *opens door* Did you bring the blender and the baking tray? Oh no I forgot I'll run back and get them.

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Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a rapist.

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What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

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how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

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did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

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Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

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I got a boner from the waitress touching my shoulder, please dislike this

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms. Why doesnt she have arms? they got bit off by a shark. Knock knock. Who's there? Not the girl.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops