What do Michael Jordan and LeBron James have in common? They both have won NBA championships...except for Lebron.

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Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Join the bro army! BROFIST! http://www.youtube.com/user/PewDiePie :D

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What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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What's worse than strapping 10 dead baibes to a tree? Strapping a dead baby to 10 trees.

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good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

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How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

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Whats blue, flies with wings, weights over two tons, and has a rocket engine with six eyeballs? *hayball rolls* Moral: Im the one asking you...

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Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

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What did the Jewish man get for his birthday? Pork.

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What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

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How do you make a plumer cry? Kill his family

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What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

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Two Eskimos are in a bath tub. One says pass the soap. The other says no soap; radio.

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Knock Knock the door's open, come in

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Ben Corbishley

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What did the bar say to the man? Nothing, bars can't talk

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Roses are niggas Violets are niggas I'm lil Wayne niggas rhymes with niggas

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A man walks into a bar and orders 10 shots of tequila. He later goes home drunk and beats his wife. His wife is getting a divorce.

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How do you take a shit?, by taking it to go.

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What did the Jamacian say to his friends? Yo me Rastas' on de cloud shroud atta boy 9PM we rizzle into da hitasses bar and we order us da drink of "grandpa's cough medicince" me tinks, who grees wid my view od oftaday Rastas?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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