- Anti Joke

What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

A boy walks home from school. On his way home some bullies stole his kite. When the boy got home he was greeted by a police officer that told him that his parents had been killed. The boy started crying and the Police officer said " whats wrong?". The boy replied " some bullies stole my kite".

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

Why would it matter if they believed such a thing? Are you trying to screw me over? You know that I am very competent at making myself seem like a total jackass myself right? You got a point, it is not my role to help others in life, I just guess I enjoy repairing others, it sure is a hell lot easier than repairing myself, I just enjoy repairing things I can repair I suppose, now using them as my henchmen that's just worthless. The way I see it, people that wage wars, control others, indoctrinate them, and/or accumulate great sums of wealth to the point where, well its pointless, are all just overcompensating, trying to make up for something that they cannot repair within themselves. It is only natural, I mean we humans, if we lack something, we get a lot more of something else. Thanks, you are right about that whole "soul incident" as I call it, it is strange how people often seem to know each other a lot better than they know themselves, I mean I could at any time choose to quit, to become like others, to surrender my individuality, to "give up my soul" or rather the essence of what makes us unique. But you know, ill rather die than live as a servant for a society many would say I never truly learned to understand. Truth is, I will never accept it, if true strength stops arriving from within, its because people choose to seek it from others, the day I require the approval of others in order to sustain myself, ill off myself, that's not a real definition of existence as far as my opinion goes. I mean what are we worth to ourselves, if we become beings that base our so called value on what others think about us? We should focus on becoming those that spread joy and inspire others, rather than to seek inspiration and joy from others. Why? Because its a win win scenario, you cannot spread joy if you got none, you cannot inspire others if we have no inspiration, I guess you can fake it, sometimes until it becomes real, but that is mental-ism and not ideology (not that they are complete opposites, and if they are not opposites, they can work as a synergy) I guess I had forgotten about that, tell yourself that you are great enough, and you become great, excuse me, I am dead tired, its been hours, say, how are you doing?

Whats black and can run fast? a panther.... racist

And if we met in 1780, I was a white southern aristocratic plantation owner and you were my dark skinned servant lady ... slave Whenever I could get away from the Mrs., I'd go to your shed and then I'd steal you kisses. But let's be serious, I'd still work you full time as a slave, there's a difference between romantic language and a complete disregard for socioeconomic trends.

MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY MILES IS GAY

So let's pretend two men that had been friends for a very long time, one man asks the other man how he is, so the man tells the other man how he is doing. Then that man asks the other man how he is doing. The two men were engaged in a very interesting conversation. What did the men do next? Nothing. We're pretending, remember?

What did Adam say when he saw Eve with just a fig leaf? The recipe said three frikkin figs.what the hell am I going to do with a fig leaf, you better get back in there, and hurry because I'm double parked. I was referring to Eastend married couple Adam and Eve Turner, in case there was any confusion.

A white man, a black man, and an Arab man are standing in a room. Who stole your wallet? No one, you suffer from ALS and therefore do not carry a wallet because you have no way in which to use it. To top it all off your medical bills are so high that your family would be financially better if you were to die and your dream of being an entrepreneur is slipping away as you realize that pitching an idea is difficult in a monotonous drone.

What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

A black man shoots someone. He was a cop and he killed a dangerous man who attacked him.

Why did the boy not eat his ice cream? He was addicted to self afflicting. The blood from one of his newer slashes oozed out on the cone which being wafer slowly got soggy. At this point the ice cream slid out of the cone as it was soggy and as he went to eat it, he found an abssence of ice cream. After this unprecedented occurance he gave up with his self harming, so all was good.

Why did it take the rabbit so long to enter the rabbithole? Because he was hit by a truck and lost a lot of blood.

How do you tell if a black man is ok? Poke it with a very long pole and keep your distance...

Why did the Chinese man fall down the stairs? He was shot in the face.

What did the cat say to the dog? Communism

Why hasn't little Johnny ever had a clown at his birthday party? Johnny is an underprivileged Hispanic member of the community.

Guest what in the butt

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." The man of the house subsequently notifies his government that genetic engineering is going awry.

Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

why was the black man running away from the convenient store? He was going for a jog and it just so happened that he passed by the store

What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

Q: If your 17 year-old-daughter is a drug addict, how many cartwheels are you going to have to do to make it to Georgia? A: The French Revolution, because your grandmothers facebook shows an 11 year-old selling Concords to a green alien, which can only mean that over 600 people watch porn daily.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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