whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

Yo momma's so poor, she needs to work 2 jobs to support her family.

My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

What do you call a black woman working at a bar? A Bartender. What do you call an asian woman working at a bar? A Bartender.

I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

alert("Hello");

"Lassie, Lassie, come quick! Timmy is in the well!" "I'm a dog," replies Lassie. "You folks have ropes, ladders, and opposable thumbs. What the hell could I possibly do to help?" With that final act of disobedience, Lassie was turned into fertilizer.

GOODBYE

If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

What separates man from animal? Divorce.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

My dad died on Mothers Day, my mother was happy. Actually Iied, we were all sad.

What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mustang? I don't have a Mustang in my garrage.

What do two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A scholarship to a prestigious college that he did not deserve.

Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

Why did the clown fall out of the tree? He got shot.

“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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