Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

Why did people run from the chicken? Because they didnt want to get bit by the chicken

Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

What is your name? My name is Jeff

A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar and have a friendly argument over their religious beliefs.

Why did labour not win the election in 2010? Because they are clearly shit.

There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

aodhan hearty

If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

What's worse than being short? Being a Tutsi in 1994.

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

Why Jimmy doesn't listen to his mother? Because he's deaf

Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

What kind of king has 2 heads? A card!

Your momma is so fat that she is a plus size model and gets paid very well for modeling. Good for her.

What's brown and hides in the closet? The Diarrhea of Anne Frank.

What do Michael Jordan and LeBron James have in common? They both have won NBA championships...except for Lebron.

38 studio's new game... Finance City

What did the Jewish man get for his birthday? Pork.

why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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