Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what did the dog say to the cat nothing because dogs can`t talk and if they could talk the cat wouldn`t understand him because cats can`t talk

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I f*cked your mom You have aids.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the little kid say to the stranger? Nothing. He was taught not to talk to strangers.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many dead babies can fit in a barrel? 4 1/2

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why can't the man get a good jod? Because he did not go to college and there for did not get a good education.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

whats white jizz

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

thumb_up thumb_down -17

roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the cookie go to the doctor, beause he was feeling really crumby...becuase he has testicular cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Me: What postion in baseball does a cat play? You: I don't know? What? Me: I don't know i haven't eaten that part yet.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are baked until ready and then enjoyed be the person who made them.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A woman walks up to a man in a supermarket and asks him where she can find the potatos. He says "I think they are all the way at the end on aisle 3" "Thanks" she says. Then she gets to aisle 3, and there aint no potatos!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and about not being funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a woman between two houses? Her name.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops