Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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I was just thinking in something I swear ... I am still Just, wait, i'll be good

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Knock Knock, Who's There? Not Ann Frank because she died in the Holocaust along with 6 million other innocent people.

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roses are black your mamas white i didnt mean to say it but it's right

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What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

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You're so fake, Barbara Millicent Roberts is jealous of you.

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What does a salmon and a falcon have in common They both live underwater except for the falcon.

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Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

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What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber with a chicken? Most likely some kind of singing human-chicken monster, although given the little research done on cross-species splicing, this is a highly improbable circumstance.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Yo' mom is so fat, She should probably consider a low fat diet in which no more than 30% of the calories are from fat.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

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Why did moral man lose his superpowers? Because he read the pointless superpowers section and realized its pointless... Moral: yeah this is my power... :(

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What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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Tunechi

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knock knock who`s there me oh come in

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A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

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Knock Knock. Who's there? ...(No answer)

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How meny Jews can you fit in an ash-tray? None. There to big

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When life gives you Live Aid, celebrate the fact that you've just gone back in time 27 years and somehow cheated death temporarily.

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What did Santa say when he fell down? Ouch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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