How hard is it to cross a man with a tree? Jesus only needed a few nails

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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How do you kill a dumb blonde? Personally, I love stabbing them.

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I played the spoon game. In a white neighborhood.

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What would Walt Disney do if he were alive today? Gurgle and choke inside his cryogenic vault as liquid nitrogen flooded into his lungs.

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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What did the Mexican, the European, and the Canadian all have in common? They weren't used in this joke the last time someone posted it on anti-joke.com.

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how come the tadpoles dad told him he can't be a nurse? he has 2 b a frog!

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Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

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Whats funny? Your face.

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yo momma so old that when she whent to school there was no history class

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Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

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I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

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Why was the boy crying? he was so happy his mom bought him a playstation 3

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When life gives you limes, say hey! wait a second ,aren't these meant to be lemons? then kill yourself

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick

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Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did Michael dye. Because he was dyslexic and a plain fell on his noggin.

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how many dumbasses does it take to make a kushagra

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Roses are red, Violets are Violets. Screw this poem. Potato.

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Niall Horan

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rose are red so is u want to know why because i shot her

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Why did Sally sell seashells by the seashore? Because she has no arms and couldn't find a job.

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A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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