Why did people call the girl a cow? Because she was fat.

What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, in fact, the "road" in this joke symbolizes the Mexican/American border. The chicken's real name is Esteban Jimenez and he crossed the "road" to reach his family on the other side so he can start his life over. In addition to this, Esteban's real dream was to establish a 401k and possibly go to law school so he could begin his own law firm.

What's worse than 10 babies in one bin? 1 baby in 10 bins.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Why did the deer hunter shoot a deer? He told his wife he bought a new TV.

Kim Kardashian.

In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died

What do you call a joke with no punchline?

Why couldn't Peter climb the tree? Because he's a fish.

What did Jesus get for Christmas? Birthday presents.

What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

A dyslexic man walked into a bar. Even though he couldn't read the sign, it was still a bar.

Once upon a time, there was a potato named Ollie. Ollie was confused, because potatoes shouldn't have brains. One day, Ollie fell madly in love with a refridgerator named Bob. Chick-Fil-A killed both of them for being homosexuals. Chick-Fil-A then ate some Oreoes. The end.

What did the dog say to its anus? Woof

How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

Yo Mama's so fat, she weighs more than an electron.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being raped by a giant scorpion

how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

What did mike Tyson say to the midget? ''Hello'' He's actually a relatively nice man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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