Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

Why did people call the girl a cow? Because she was fat.

what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

Knock knock "Steve I have a door bell."

what did the orphan get for Christmas? a family

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died

In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

whats worse then justin beiber NOTHING

haw are alligators and turtles simaler? They are both reptiles and carnavores and their speaces goes all the way back to the dinosoar ages

Kenny G

What's gay and gay? Joe

Cnorris can carry very heavy objects

why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

In the future... "Hey Apple! Hey, hey Apple!" "What the heck, Orange! You've been doing this for the last 10 billion years!"

How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

What did mike Tyson say to the midget? ''Hello'' He's actually a relatively nice man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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