In Soviet Russia, people are dying of starvation.

A man comes home late from work what does he find? His wife and children murdered.

What did the old man say to his grandson before he kicked the bucket?? "I wonder how far i can kick this bucket..."

Roses are red, violets are blue That's a fact.

How can you tell if someone is gay? It depends, sometimes they can be flamboyant or not. Actually, one could be straight and still be flamboyant, that's what makes the world less boring. Everyone is different, there's no surefire way of knowing, unless of course they tell you that they're gay.

roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

how do you drown a blonde? chain her to a cinder block and throw her off a bridge.

Want to know who gets head a lot? Balloons

what do you call a black doctor ? a doctor moron

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

1+1= 69

Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

What makes the world go round? Gravity.

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

a black guy and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? a taxi driver.

a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

What's funny? Women's rights.

Who was the dinosaurs favorite NBA player? He didnt have one. Dinosaurs became extinct far before the NBA was established.

What's cooler than ice ? Liquid oxygen.

So I went to the airport the other day, and the new TSA regulations are very strict.

Potato salad

Robin, get into the Batmobile.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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