Q :What do you call a cow running through a field? A: Bob

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Two robots are walking down the street together and walk into a bar. Just kidding, they can't walk because they have Polio.

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Do you know what's funny about the holocaust? Nothing, it was an unspeakably evil act by a deranged man who should never have been given the power to command a nation

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If pro is the opposite of con . Is congress the opposite of progress?

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What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

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What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

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Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

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Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

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What's better than nailing a baby into the wall? Football.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He was buried under 6ft of solid earth.

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What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head? a bullet

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your mama smells so bad she should probably go take a shower.

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What did Shakespeare say to the software designer? Nothing.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

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Knock knock "Steve I have a door bell."

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Rick Perry.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, in fact, the "road" in this joke symbolizes the Mexican/American border. The chicken's real name is Esteban Jimenez and he crossed the "road" to reach his family on the other side so he can start his life over. In addition to this, Esteban's real dream was to establish a 401k and possibly go to law school so he could begin his own law firm.

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Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks." The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks." The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks." They were moose tracks.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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If I have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, we both have the same monetary value.

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Kim Kardashian.

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Austin. kid with long hair, sat next to paymon who had short hair. "Go cut ur hair." "ok"

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Q. What's like a square block of ice? A. A refrigerator.

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Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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