How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

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Hitler. lol, sucks.

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What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate poems Penis.

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Anti jokes are funny, but also not.

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Knock knock. Use the doorbell, dumbass.

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Theres 3 guys walking and the see a genie. He says hell grant 3 wishes. The first guy asked for sandals. The genie said"I can do that" and he got sandals. The second guy asked for rock hard abs.The genie said,"sure thing".When he looked down, he saw that he had rock hard abs. The third guy asked for a pair of pants."ok" Said the genie. And then he got a pair of pants.

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Female Athletics

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what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

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whats the difference between a black guy and a park bench? well a park bench is an inanimate object that people use to sit on and feed the birds at the park. and a black guy is a living being who is looked down upon in society.

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What did Jesus get for Christmas? Birthday presents.

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What's worse then Obama? Nothing

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when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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Two Jews walk in a bar...

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William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

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What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

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Roses are red Violets are blue

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What has an extra toe and is a bad role model for little girls? Miley Cyrus.

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noodles

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A man walked into a bar. He said "ow".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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