Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

thumb_up thumb_down +28

a 12 year old walks into a bar she orders a drink and dies she then walks out of the bar

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Whats black, white, and huge? The world if you are a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What has lips and smells like a fish? A fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A horse walks into a bar. He ordered some fries.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

whats worse than one bee sting... two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings... the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust... three bee stings

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a black man with a gun? A police officer.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: How do you get a one armed Pollock out of a tree? A: Call the fire department.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

WHAT DO YOU CALL MEXICANS IN A HOT TUBE BOILED BEANS (; NO RACIAL

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's 6 + 9? 15.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's worse than heartbreak? Getting run over by a steamroller.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

DERP

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops