Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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How do you make a baby cry? You leave it unattended

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roses are red, violets are red, bushes are red, flowers are red, trees are red, my garden is red... HOLY CRAP MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!

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HaHaHaHa... Was the last joke funny? Ya, well this ones not.

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What do you get if you cross a mexican with a pineapple? Nothing, they are two different physical forms thus incapable of becoming a new object.

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What do you call an epileptic in a bowl? James, if that happens to be his name.

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What's in there? Get outta there...

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as it is capable of. Personally depends on the weight of the wood.

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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William Raines.

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What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

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is this love , is this love , is this love , that im feeling , no bob im afraid its cancer.

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Why did the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus.

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Whats Orange,Leathery gets passed around by sweaty dudes and the next name will start with an S Snooki

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make me a sandwich!

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I have no joke. u mad?

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I wish I Charlie Sheen's Dealer.

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In Soviet Russia, people are dying of starvation.

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An armed ninja walks into a bank. He is apprehended by the police, whom he tries to attack with a drawn sword, and is promptly shot down in a hail of gunfire causing civilian injuries and rather significant property damage.

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why did my girlfriend fail her test? she was pregnant :'(

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whats the same about a turtle and another turtle? they both seem to like lettuce

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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