Dani Barton = Stupid

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti jokes are funny, but also not.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What happened when Timmy divided by zero? A: He got a syntax error.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Look at your hand. Made you look!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

q. whats worse than finding your girlfriend cheating on you a. the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +5

apple pie.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's brown and sticky? Brown paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

One man's junk is another man's pleasure.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is the difference between Whitney Houston and Elvis. They are dead. And it make people go boo hoo

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A moth walks into a podiatrist's office. The podiatrist says, "Moth, what's the problem?" And the moth says, "What's the problem. Well, doc, where do I begin? Every day I get up to another cruel sky. It's like the sun is mocking me as I begin the gruelling preparations for another 8-hours of slogging in meaningless toil for my boss, Gregor McIvanichisky. A grey self, captive in a grey cubicle in a grey office with no windows that I might see the grey clouds beyond... I just sit in my cubicle as I feel the throbbing ache of the best days of my life being raped away into a monotonous, forgettable slurry of irrelevant corporate drudgery. I don't know what I'm doing, I don't think my boss even knows. All he knows is that he has power over me. And my children...my daughter is always on her cellphone, texting and emailing. I haven't spoken real words to her in weeks. My oldest son is never home and when he is, he's locked in his room listening to angry music. My youngest son, he's only 4, I look at him and he asks me to play... and I feel nothing. No love, no tenderness... just a void. And when I look in the mirror...I don't recognize the face staring back at me. It's aged so much from the boyish looks I remember. The years have carved deep lines of despair, worry and anguish. Dark, hollow eyes where once gleamed hope and excitement. Thin lips unable to find the smile of the happy, old days. If only I could find the courage to reach over to the side table and remove the loaded gun. And then find the strength to pull back that hammer as the chamber rotates, clicking solidly into place...Raising it to my temple for the final squeeze that will erase the last shreds of my existence from this cold grave of a life wasted away." And the podiatrist says, "Well, Moth, you're in pretty rough shape. You need to get some help. But why did you come to me? You need a psychiatrist!!" And the moth says... "Because the light was on."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's funnier than 24? 25

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? i dont have a ferrari in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Liars go to hell! -God

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock Knock Who's there A pile up A pile up who

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Jonathan is like a btterfly. They're both asianu

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats Orange,Leathery gets passed around by sweaty dudes and the next name will start with an S Snooki

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did Sally go to McDonalds? Because she felt like it

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why did the black man eat two buckets of fried chicken? because he was hungry and he likes fried chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

There was a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman. All three of three of them walked into a bar. They began a heated debate over the benefits of their healthcare plan, payed the tab on their drink, then proceeded to drive home in their Toyota Prius.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the snowman melt? It got tired of everyday life and decided that it would be best if he disappeared from society... His name was Dave...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops