NEVER

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

A baby seal walks into a club

Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm a dog

Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

Q - Want to hear a joke? A - Me Too.

what goes oom oom a cow walking backwards

What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

French people.

An american, a mexican, and an asian are on a boat. The boat is sinking because it is too heavy. The people decide to throw off things that they have a lot of in their country. The asian throws rice off the boat saying, "We have plenty of rice at home." The mexican throws tacos off the boat saying, "We have plenty of tacos at home." The american throws out the mexican saying, "We have plenty of mexicans at home."

What part of the cape were you on? Cod.

whats blue and fluffy ? Blue fluff

where did napolean keep his armies? In his sleevies!

how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

Let's write an anti-joke. K.

Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

What do you call an Iraqi man steering the plane? a pilot, you racist.

What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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