Whats green and tasty? Snot

If pro is the opposite of con . Is congress the opposite of progress?

what was the funniest part of the titanic sinking? nothing, many innocent people were killed and left their family devastated.

A racist indian (from india) walks into a bar (in india). A catholic priest walks into the same bar. The bar says 'moo'. The bar is a shape-shifting cow.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

Women's rights.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The customers observing this quickly leave because the bartender is talking to a horse, which does not talk.

Carlton

I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

a man killed wife. he successfully rid the scene of all evidence and buried the body under a bridge. unfortunately he forgot to bury the head and went to jail for life.

why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

whats blue and doesnt like cheese? the sky, i was only messing about the cheese

what do you get from sleeping with a hooker? An orgasm

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

What do you call a joke with no punchline?

In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

Hitler. lol, sucks.

Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

Why did the boy get hit by a car? Because he didn't look both ways

Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

Kenny G

Q: what do you call a guy named Aaron? A: Aaron

Whats similar between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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