Q.Who do you call a lesbian. A.Shhaammmmm

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Your mama's so fat that we couldn't catch the cancer early and it gave her crippling weight problem. I'm so sorry.

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What's 6 + 9? 15.

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Q:why did the chicken cross the road. A:to get back to the farm he was raised on

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what did the apple say to the banana nothing, bananas cant talk

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What did Helen Keller get at the store? Glasses

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What happens in the end of the original "Pinocchio" Italian fairy tale? He is hanged.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

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What's the difference between Stevie Wonder and Kevin Bacon? There's none. Neither of them is a taxi driver.

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A man walks into a bar. He breaks his neck and his insurance provider hikes up his interest rate.

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What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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Why was Frankenstein green? Because he painted himself green. Frankenstein is the scientist, not the monster.

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What did the Muslim do on 911? He weeped for the loss of his many good friends and relatives

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

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Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

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Joshua Brown was in a dark forest, with a misty haze surrounding him. He turned quickly and flicked his hair out of his face. Dylan Hodge appeared and they had wild sex all night!

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A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

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there are 2 muffins in an oven they are cooked nicely and served as a tasty dessert

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are being pursued by the cops. They run into an old barn for a place to hide. They each hid in a different potato sack. The cops enter the barn, and seeing no one, leave and continue the search somewhere else. The three girls flee the country and give up their life of crime. The cops later go get some donuts.

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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