Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

What did the man do after a bad day at work? He went home and beat his wife

roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

This is a joke for Homeless people:

How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him access to food stamps

Roses are red, violets are blue Vodka is cheaper that dinner for two.

Roses are red, violets are blue. Except, technically, violets are violet.

Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and proceeded to have gay sex on the floor.

I can't see my forehead

A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

what did the orphan get for Christmas? a family

why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

Why was the Librarian mad at the laughing kids?? they were laughing cause someone shot her.

Did you hear about the one with the priest, the boy, and the dildo? Yes, sadly I have.

The sandwich asked the girl to make her a boy.

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? Nigger

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? He was shot.

do you want my comeback? its in your mums mouth

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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