Why did the golfer take an extra pair of pants to the golf course? In case they ripped and he needed a replacement.

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In Soviet Russia, people are dying of starvation.

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Yo momma is so fat, she has to wear a large shirt

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How do u make a plumer cry? You kill his family!

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Why does six love nine? They both get pleasured

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Why was the black man chasing the little girl? The black man was the adoptive parent of the little girl and they were playing tag.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

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What's worse than being human? Nothing... No I literally mean nothing at all. Like not being anything?

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How can you tell if someone is gay? It depends, sometimes they can be flamboyant or not. Actually, one could be straight and still be flamboyant, that's what makes the world less boring. Everyone is different, there's no surefire way of knowing, unless of course they tell you that they're gay.

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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A ship sinks in the middle of the South Pacific, only one man survives. He swims over to a deserted island.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

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What do you call something round and red that tastes like a tomato and shoots through walls? A Super Tomato. And what do you call a banana that shoots through walls? A banana trying to be a Super Tomato.

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What do you call a black woman getting hit in the face? Domestic Violence.

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how do you grow a choade? idk ask shea

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21

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what do you call a black doctor ? a doctor moron

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youre gay

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1+1= 69

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A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Anti jokes are funny

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What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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