How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to take three harpoons to the chest and still manage to feast on a family of baby seals...... Hi my name is Joey

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

thumb_up thumb_down -10

knock knock who's there ?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Jewish guy walks into a bar. He owns the place.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your mother is overweight. This is largely due to her sedentary lifestyle.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are red I'm colorblind

thumb_up thumb_down -10

how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your mama is so fat but she is also a very kind and friendly person so her weight doesn't bother me at all,

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: Why does it snow in Canada and not in Mexico? A: Because Canada is far from the equator and Mexico isn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Two men are walking down the street. They both don't make eye contact and continue walking.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A batch of muffins is baking in an oven. One muffin says to another... Oh sorry, scratch that, they can't talk; they're f***ing muffins. (CSC)

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was the black man driving a plane? because he was a pilot, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A white guy a black guy and a mexican are in a car and the car crashes and blowes up who dies? They all die cuz they all were in the car when it blew up

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats 9 inches long, pink, and makes women scream? A miscarriage OuO

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what did the blond say to his mother?? Nothing. He is deaf and has to use sign language.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb? Obviously more than six because my bass meant is still dark.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops