Do You Know You Have Cancer?

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There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause it wanted to. Why di the chicken cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the cow's face.

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What do black people and bananas have in common? 50% of their DNA

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a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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Why was there a red chicken? He tried crossing the road.

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hey guys im gay

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a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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1 + 1 = 2 If it was equal to 11 the problem would be impossible

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Why was the black family eating at K.F.C? The food there is really good and they had a discount on the family bucket.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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How do you make a baby fit in a bottle? Blender.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

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whats white and sticky? a white stick

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Justin with a hat.

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How do you define an unsatisfactory kitchen? It won't have a woman chained to the oven.

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Why did the young boy cross the road? because his dad beats him due to alcoholism and his mother is a crack whore.

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Why did the chinese doctor get fired? Because he was involved in a malpractice suit.

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why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by 7, who is a rapist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops