Why did the man die when he saw the light? It was a strobe light and he died from an epileptic seizure

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Ha! You're so gay that I respect the sexuality you were born with and I feel completely comfortable with, and happy for, you and your preferences.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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why does everyone like this website? ... because every other joke a little baby is dying.

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Why did the man sit down? Because he was tired of standing up.

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Josh is sooo great at blowing, xoxo Dylan Hodge.

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There are 2 women at a bus stop. One of them has a swollen belly. The pregnant woman says to the other one, "I'm expecting a baby." The other woman responds, "That's too bad. I'm expecting a bus, at least that'll help me."

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What's worse than having to listen a song from Justin Bieber? Being wrongfully convicted of child molestation,rape and murder and spending 50 years in prison before being acquited by DNA-analysis.

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A fat kid walks into a school. RUN KIDS IT'S BOMBER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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How do Chinese people name their kids? They could look up a baby-names book, consult their family history, or make one up

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A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

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A man walks into a bar, and sees another man with a huge orange head. He asks the bartender, "Do you know why that man has such a huge orange head?" The bartender replies: I dont know, maybe if you buy him a drink he'll tell you. So that man walks over to the man with a huge orange head and buys him a drink. He says to him: Excuse me, sir but why do you have a big orange head? The man with the big orange head replies: Well, one day I was walking along the beach and I found an interesting bottle. So I opened it and out popped a genie. He told me I had three wishes. The first thing I asked for was to have all the money that I wanted, and the means to get more. Suddenly, My pockets were overflowing with cash. So then I wished for the most beautiful, perfect woman ever created and there she appeared in front of me, and we immediately fell in love. The third thing I asked for was a huge orange head.

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how do you put a elephant in a fridge? open it and put it inside. how do you put a lion in a frige? you take out the elephant and put in the lion. there is a meeting for all the animals in the world which animal doesnt go? the lion because he's in the fridge. a man callshis dog and it doesnt come why not? because its at the meeting

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Yo mamma's so fat she has her own zip code!!! :) Well... the actual reason is she is filthy rich and her house is so big that it takes up a bunch of room, and now that im talking about her i really wanna be her even though shes fat!

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Guy 1:Whats the difference between a towel and toilet paper? Guy2: I dont know Guy : SO IT WAS YOU!

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What is a turkey? The offspring of a turtle and a monkey.

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My brother gave my mom AIDS. My mom gave my dad AIDS. My dad gave my dog AIDS. My dog gave me AIDS. I gave my sister AIDS. My sister called the police because of the wild case of AIDS.

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Q: What's the difference between Osama's death and Paris Hilton's bra? A: One is Osama's death and the other is Paris Hilton's bra.

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Why couldn't the girl find a date to the prom? Because she was really, really ugly.

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That moment when the worst part of the movie, is when your pregnant wife pees on the couch.....

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Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

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There's a black man in my family tree. Therefore, I could be considered biracial.

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How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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