For every person with a broken heart, there is another person out there with a stapler <3 And that person really needs to staple their math papers together so they can turn them in.

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mary had a little lamb its fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went this joke has no punchline

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Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

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im a policeman the car infront of me had a foot hanging out of the trunk. i pulled him over. i closed the trunk and proceeded to inform him of the dangers of open trunks.

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A Mormon walks out of a bicycle store.

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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Charlie Sheen

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Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

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What two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

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POOP.....People Order Our Patties

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Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except for the cases when you die...then you are dead.

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Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

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What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

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What do humans and trees have in common? -If you hit them with an ax multiple times, they fal down

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What's bad about four black men in a car going over a cliff? It was my car.

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What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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knock knock. who's there? interupting doctor. interupting doctor who....you have cancer.

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There was a boy named Johnson. He was a happy boy who had a mother and father who loved. One day he didn't do his homework

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The Walmart Scooterwhale (Terracetus obesitus) is the only member of the cetacean family to live in a terrestrial environment. Commonly found in large-scale grocery stores all across North America, it subsists mostly on fattening junk food, microwave popcorn, and beer.

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What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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