Why did the kid drop his ice-cream? Because he tripped on a dead guy!

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Why couldnt the man buy food? Because.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face

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The New York Giants

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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CFL

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What is worse then your car getting hijacked? A 900 pound man eating a Donut.

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What did the truck driver get when he ran over my cat? A pave low.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

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Why was the man denied access to the college Because he did not have good grades in the past.

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What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

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Walt disney Walks Into A Bar, The Bartender says "WOAH ITS WALT DISNEY!"

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Why did the car go down the road? Someone was driving it. Why did the car stop? Because he suddenly fell and had a stroke.

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What's the difference between Marvin Gay and George Straight. They are two different people

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69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

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What did the child say after the priest touched him? Thank you for the ashes Father, have a blessed Lenten season.

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whats brown and sticky a stick

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i walked into a bar, the bar tender for some reason said get out. the bartender did not realise that i was the #1 criminal in america. but why would he, i was in cuba. ( i was seven at the time)

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knock knock who's there? ketchup ketchup who? better catchup with me!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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