What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

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Why did the guy throw a clock out of his window? Because he had mental issues.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

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What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

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Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

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What's black and white and red all over? A post-racial communist country.

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Why did the plane crash Because Joe diragi is so fat

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What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

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Justin Bieber had sex with a woman.

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- Bob, what's interesting to see in NYC ? - Yes, exactly

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies? A young girl you know personally, completely alone with leukemia.

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nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

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Two men walk into a bar. Seeing as the first man could have suffered a concussion, and been seriously hurt, The second man ducks to avoid also being hit by the bar.

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

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what did the girl say when she got a ring? OHHH look i got a ring!

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I am the sun. You are the moon.

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Roses are red Violets are blue

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whats the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? i dont have a ferrari in my garage

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What is worse then failing a test? Cancer

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Why was the black man chasing the little girl? The black man was the adoptive parent of the little girl and they were playing tag.

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Knock Knock Who's there A pile up A pile up who

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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