Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

thumb_up thumb_down +41

whats worse than the holocaust??? finding it in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Once upon a time there was beautiful princess, ONCE!

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Aaron Cummings is me. Find me on facebook:)

thumb_up thumb_down +29

cc

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A dirty joke: The white horse fell in the mud.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so try can be used interchangeably.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A man runs over a woman wth his car. Whose fault was it? The man because he should be driving on the roads, not in the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

tim tebow is a great quarterback

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: What do you call a group of asians riding their bikes while carrying large bags of merchandise filled with an ample amount of video games? A: Obviously, a few enviromentally-friendly entrepreneurs who managed to make enough of a profit via their established buisness to the extent that they could buy what they required and get some other desired items as well.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A women gets on a bus, the bus driver says 'that is the ugliest baby i have ever seen!' the women pays for her ticket and sits on one of the seats while the bus pulls off.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Tina's parents stop calling her? Because they died

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what do you call 4 terrorists going off a cliff in a car? A waist because you can fit 2 more in the trunk.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Asians...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you tell if your sister is on her period? Cause your dads dick tastes funny...

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man walks into a bar. The bar tender asks him "why the long face?" He replies "Because I'm a horse, you jackass".

thumb_up thumb_down +11

When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops