A man walks into a bar. The bar tender asks him "why the long face?" He replies "Because I'm a horse, you jackass".

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A guy walks into a bar and thinks of a superlative anti-joke. After having an enjoyable time at the bar he then promptly goes home and posts it for the world to see.

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What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

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Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

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What do you expect from a perverted demon? -nothing less perverted!

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What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

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Chuck Norris died.

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What do you call an Iraqi man steering the plane? a pilot, you racist.

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What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

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apple pie.

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Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies? A young girl you know personally, completely alone with leukemia.

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whats the difference between a white man and a black man? I like cake

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what did the girl say when she got a ring? OHHH look i got a ring!

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I am the sun. You are the moon.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Your Mom.

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How did the man become sterilized? Blow-dart through the testicle.

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whats the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? i dont have a ferrari in my garage

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I'm Spartacus

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How do you stop an assassin? Kill their target

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We were hooking up and her mom walked in, i stood up, apologized and left

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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how many scrubbers does it take to change a lightbulb 2, 1 to change it , and 1 to make it smell like urine.

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A man walked into a bar, he spilled his drink.

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Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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