A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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how do you grow a choade? idk ask shea

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What do you get with two banana peels? Compost.

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whos got a massive fukkinn melon...B.I.M

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Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

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One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

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why did the man walk into the metal pole? because hes blind and suffers from cancer.

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What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Tie her up and force her to watch as you brutally murder her entire family.

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater.

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What happened when a gay man asked a straight man what time it was? He told him the correct time, they parted ways and went about with their lives.

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One drunk bug looks over to another drunk bug and guess what it says? Your a glitch

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why was little tommy thirsty? because he had juvenile diobetese

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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What's white and black and red all over? Slaughtered Cows.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it damn well felt like it.

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Why are video games fun? To get a mushy brain :P

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Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

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How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

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WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

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What do you call a man with 3 legs and one arm jumping on a trampoline? By his name.

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A fish walks into a bar

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

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What did the man say to the atractive woman? Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops