"I lost the game." Hahahahahahahahahahahaha in your face

What do u call a black person in your backyard? Mufasa

Why is there so much hate in the world? Because you touch yourself at night.

Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

What is the saddest color? Red because his family recently was killed

What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

Why did Suzy drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy!

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks connor sucks 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Why was the clown murdered? Because it laughed at my cousin so he ran right into the icicle 10 times to the heart

What's big, red and looks like a bucket? A small blue bucket labeled big red bucket.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

crips r blue bloodz r red choose crips nd thn ur dead (bloodz swoopp)

Did you see that van with the word "Free Candy" painted on it? I'm also glad to see a successful entrepreneur capable of advertising free wares as an incentive to attract customers in such a recession. It's a great deal for both parties.

Q:What time is it when you have to go to the dentist? A: It varies. But most dental offices are open for service between 8am and 4pm

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

A fairly-priced Apple computer.

Why did the man throw his alarm clock out the window? Because he has anger management issues.

How do you beat someone in a video game? You win it.

A Man visits his Doctor because he is feeling slightly unwell.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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