Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

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Q: what do you call a guy named Aaron? A: Aaron

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Dallas Cowboys

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Eggplant.

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What did the egg say to the cup? I love your hairdo! Girl, who is your stylist?

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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knock knock who's there? the police you are wanted for 5 counts of 1st degree murder.

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Female Athletics

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Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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Whats the difference between two flies? Nothing, they're both flies.

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women's rights

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Roses are red Violets are blue

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being mentally retarded.

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PEN15 IF U R SMART U WILL UNDERSTAND THIS

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your anti-joke

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your spouse is in hospital.

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Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

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Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

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87

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How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ..To get to the other side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops