What's the difference between a baby and a pineapple? Pineapples were not shot by nazis during the holocaust.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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Why did the Polar Bear fall through the ice? The ice was unable to support his mass

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Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

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Q: What's big and white and can't climb trees? A: a fridge

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Ben is gay

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall. First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head? a bullet

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If life throws you lemons Catch them

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What's black and white and red all over? A Giant Panda that has been killed by poachers.

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What makes the world go round? Gravity.

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womens rights

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how do you tell a joke on anti-joke? you don't.

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? He was shot.

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Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

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What didn't last long? You in the bed

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How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it damn well felt like it.

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Q: How do find the population of Mexico? A: You Google it.

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WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

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Boy: Hey, guess who likes you. Girl: Who? Boy: NOBODY!!!!!!!!

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9/11 isn't funny. 19 Muslims died that day.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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