Knock, knock. Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your spouse is in hospital.

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Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

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Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

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Laws are initially proposed in Parliament as bills. They become Acts after being approved three times by Parliamentary votes and then receiving Royal Assent from the Governor-General. The majority of bills are promulgated by the government of the day (that is, the party or parties that have a majority in Parliament). It is rare for government bills to be defeated, indeed the first to be defeated in the twentieth century was in 1998. It is also possible for individual MPs to promote their own bills, called member's bills; these are usually put forward by opposition parties, or by MPs who wish to deal with a matter that parties do not take positions on.

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Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

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how many scrubbers does it take to change a lightbulb 2, 1 to change it , and 1 to make it smell like urine.

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Hair

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What's red, white, and black, and spins around? A kitten in a blender

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what have big boobs, and fat ass ? fat man

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

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why did the sock go to kroger cause he was laying on the couch

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Why couldn't the man walk? He didn't have any legs.

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Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

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what do you call a black doctor ? a doctor moron

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the awkward when you said "moment" in your head

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What's green and goes "Kablowie!"? Probably nothing.

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Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

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I can't see my forehead

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Why did the Polar Bear fall through the ice? The ice was unable to support his mass

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Why did the white man win the race Because there were no black people attending

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How do you keep a dog from chasing it's tail? cut off it's legs.

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What happened when a gay man asked a straight man what time it was? He told him the correct time, they parted ways and went about with their lives.

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I used to love Christmas Until Santa woke me up and told me my dad didn't exist....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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