"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

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what was the funniest part of the titanic sinking? nothing, many innocent people were killed and left their family devastated.

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What happened when a fish rode a bike? It fell off and injured itself.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Police, your family just died in a car accident/

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A horse walked into a barn...

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What's big? Jupiter.

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What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

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Why was the baseball player arrested after stealing a base? Because he pulled out a knife and stabbed the shortstop in the chest.

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What do you call two homosexuals in fancy hats? It depends, you have to ask their names first.

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What's worst then not getting anything on Christmas? Rape, Murder, Dying.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a nice man.

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Why did the fat black guy fail his eye exam? He's blind.

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there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

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How do you escape from being enlisted in the army of your nation? Flee to a different country and bring along your valuables.

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-What did the gay guy say in Mcdonald's? -Ill have a number 10, with hot sauce and a large coke.

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Why didn't Dave buy his wife a watch for her birthday? Because she already had one.

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Your mom is so fat that her BMI is in the morbidly obese column.

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Why did the Latino feel uncomfortable during anal, vaginal, and oral sex simultaneously? Because she was being raped by three men.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan.

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What ticks like a clock and has numbers on it? A clock.

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Doctor! Doctor! Can I have a second opinion? The Doctor then sits the patient down and tells them from a different perspective that they have terminal Cancer and will be dead by the end of the year.

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Q: What do you call a Mexican who gets his car stolen. A: Pablo

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A whole family go to a water park. They have a great day.

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what did the orphan get for Christmas? a family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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