What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Want to know who gets head a lot? Balloons

thumb_up thumb_down -81

A dyslexic man sells his soul to Santa.

thumb_up thumb_down -119

What can't think, see, hear, taste, or smell? A Headless Cat

thumb_up thumb_down +128

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down +100

Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down +42

There were a boy with cancer, and when a said "were" is because he is dead now

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head? a bullet

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Goat balls.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

why was little tommy thirsty? because he had juvenile diobetese

thumb_up thumb_down +32

how do you tell a joke on anti-joke? you don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Three blondes were stuck on an island, one of them wished for a motorboat, later on they all died of starvation

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why are anti jokes funny? You can trick an old person to think they are

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's pink and smells like a red rose? A pink rose.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

whats stupid, retarded, and dumb an Erin Perri.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock knock... Whos there? The IRS, we are taking your house.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops