how many scrubbers does it take to change a lightbulb 2, 1 to change it , and 1 to make it smell like urine.

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Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

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What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

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Knock, Knock. Who's There? To get to the other side.

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What did the rapist say when he spotted the young girl? I am going to rape you!

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

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Why do some RVs have 2 doors? Because 11 would be too many.

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Why was the deaf boy crying at Christmas? He got an iPod.

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How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

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A dyslexic man sells his soul to Santa.

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why did the man walk into the metal pole? because hes blind and suffers from cancer.

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a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

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What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Tie her up and force her to watch as you brutally murder her entire family.

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Why did the Polar Bear fall through the ice? The ice was unable to support his mass

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One penguin says to another penguin, "It looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other penguin says, "Yea, I have to go to dinner party later."

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Haikus are easy They are simpler than you think Just don't run out of...

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What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head? a bullet

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A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

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AND

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What didn't last long? You in the bed

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

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How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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