What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

What's black and white and red all over? A Giant Panda that has been killed by poachers.

Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was wearing a shirt depicting a skull, something six had an irrational phobia of.

What's funny? Women's rights.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

Knock Knock! we have a door bell ...ding dong. its broken.

What's cooler than ice ? Liquid oxygen.

Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

Why did Michael Jackson like 24 year olds? Because they are apart of humanity and he had no reason to dislike them.

whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

Knock knock! Who's there? Fed-Ex. We have a package for you.

What do you call a video game nerd who insists on sitting at home all day not going out or thinking of others except for beating the level or killing the creature or leveling that skill or completely ignoring his civic duties? Accepted

Two guys walk into a bar, a spanish guy and a black guy. They get some drinks, call a taxi to arrive home safe. And kiss their wives and kids goodnight. They go to bed early after reading a wallstreet journal. And wake up early so they can both go to their jobs as college professors. To white kids.

How do porcupines have sex? The male begins by urinating all over the female. He then enters her from behind and proceeds to thrust until the act is completed.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate poems Penis.

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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