-Knock Knock -Anthony got in a car crash -Who's There -He died

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Why did the fat black man call the fatter white man. Because they were good friends and liked to talk.

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Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

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Why are there so many jokes about people walking into bars? Bars are known as a place most people go to for a social occasion, making them a place that most people can relate with.

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Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

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Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

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what did the girl say when she got a ring? OHHH look i got a ring!

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what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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What's worse then listening to Nickleback? The Holo- On second thought, nothing.

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What do you get when you cross an octopus with a camel? Nothing, inter-species breeding is impossible.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a bus? Because she's dead

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wat?

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Why did the man scream? He got his dick caught. In the zipper.

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yo momma is so stupid she went to the beach and the whales song " dooooooonnn't stop. belieeeeving. wwwwwhoooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOA"

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A man walks into a bar. He breaks his neck and his insurance provider hikes up his interest rate.

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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what did the apple say to the banana nothing, bananas cant talk

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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We were hooking up and her mom walked in, i stood up, apologized and left

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Whats the difference between Justin Beiber and Polio? Polio was cured.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

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Why did the retard have no friends? Because somebody stitched his mouth and eyes shut so he couldn't be social.

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Laws are initially proposed in Parliament as bills. They become Acts after being approved three times by Parliamentary votes and then receiving Royal Assent from the Governor-General. The majority of bills are promulgated by the government of the day (that is, the party or parties that have a majority in Parliament). It is rare for government bills to be defeated, indeed the first to be defeated in the twentieth century was in 1998. It is also possible for individual MPs to promote their own bills, called member's bills; these are usually put forward by opposition parties, or by MPs who wish to deal with a matter that parties do not take positions on.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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