Two peanuts are walking down a dark alley. One was a honey roasted.

Robin, get in the car.

JUSTIN BEING SMART

Why don't blind people own cats? They do, who told you that?

your moms so fat she has kankles

does this look unsure to you?

How did the man rob the bank? With a gun

A priest, a rabbi, and a preacher walk into a bar. They ordered a water each.

What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After be told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, Chuck walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

DERP

Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

A man walks into a bar. The bar tender asks him "why the long face?" He replies "Because I'm a horse, you jackass".

How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

How do you get a black person out of a tree? You grab a ladder and help them down.

Why did the baby stop crying? Mommy shook him.

How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

Whats the difference between two flies? Nothing, they're both flies.

Why is a zebra named gorge fat? Because it ate Mcdonalds

Why did the chicken cross the road? Eggplant.

Q. What do you call the person that graduated at the bottom of his medical department? A. Doctor

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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