a man walked into a bar and said ow

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did Madelyn leave the space next ot the computer? Because her hat got tooken from her.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q. What do you call the person that graduated at the bottom of his medical department? A. Doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +2

So a man walks into a wedding and asks the waiter where the to wait for the punch... the waiter says, "there is no punchline."

thumb_up thumb_down

Womens Sports

thumb_up thumb_down -4

You have three biscuits. Your friend eats two. How many biscuits do you have? A: 3 Your friend is bulemic so he throws them both up, so you still have them.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

your fat

thumb_up thumb_down -4

An Unicorn walks into a club, the bartender promised to quit drugs and thanks to that his family didn't fall apart and he lived happily till he was 89 when he passed away surrounded by loved ones.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

dfsgdf g dsf g sdfg sdf gsd fg sdfg s df g sdf gs df g sdf g sdfg sdf g sdfgsadg awetrawefads f asdf asdrfasrg sdf nfghjml ho ;l jkm gascSDagfgh dj gf hdfgh khdkfgkfgkj gjkf g afg adf g dfgs df g sd fg s dfg sdfg df g sdf g s df gsdf g sdf g f t r j yu k yuilk yiol o l rt wer t wer t we t w e rt w er

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the black man say to the white man? Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was the black man chasing the little girl? The black man was the adoptive parent of the little girl and they were playing tag.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the chicken cross the road? ..To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did Suzy drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the snowman melt? It got tired of everyday life and decided that it would be best if he disappeared from society... His name was Dave...

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

thumb_up thumb_down -48

What did the Hindenburg say? -nothing it just blew up

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Why couldn't the man walk? He didn't have any legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -74

One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

thumb_up thumb_down +77

Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

thumb_up thumb_down +57

what do you call a black guy on steroids? a black guy on steroids

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why did the white man win the race Because there were no black people attending

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops