Two guys walk into a bar, a spanish guy and a black guy. They get some drinks, call a taxi to arrive home safe. And kiss their wives and kids goodnight. They go to bed early after reading a wallstreet journal. And wake up early so they can both go to their jobs as college professors. To white kids.

Why did Tyrone try to sell Timmy some blow? Due to his poor educational background, lack of recommendations, and a terrible job market, Tyrone wasn't able to get a real job and had to resort to selling illegal narcotics. This wasn't something Tyrone wanted to do, because he promised himself he would never end up like his father, but this was the only way he could support his family.

French people.

What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

Laura Pratz..

why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

Q: what happens to the black guy that walks into the bar. A: He walk in ,gets a drink, and leaves

Rick Perry.

The Bible

Justin Bieber had sex with a woman.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

How do you act when you discover that the 'Submit' button doesn't work? Wait for a while until the problem fixes itself and you are able to perform the desired function.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Eggplant.

A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as it is capable of. Personally depends on the weight of the wood.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being raped by a giant scorpion

knock knock who's there? the police you are wanted for 5 counts of 1st degree murder.

One man's junk is another man's pleasure.

Why was the farmer buried in a grave on the top of a hill? He had died and this would be his final resting place.

Knock Knock Come in.

How do you stop an assassin? Kill their target

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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