A dwarf walks under a bar.

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what happened to the christian when he died? nothing because god isnt real.

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What do you call a video game nerd who insists on sitting at home all day not going out or thinking of others except for beating the level or killing the creature or leveling that skill or completely ignoring his civic duties? Accepted

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

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knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

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Two black guys walk into a bar. Bartender asks them what they want to drink.

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why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

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Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

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guy 1- damn its hot in here guy 2- then turn on the damn fireplace

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After be told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, Chuck walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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Chuck Norris died.

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How do you act when you discover that the 'Submit' button doesn't work? Wait for a while until the problem fixes itself and you are able to perform the desired function.

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Two men walk into a bar. And they enjoy a good night of drinking beer and playing pinball.

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why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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What did the egg say to the cup? I love your hairdo! Girl, who is your stylist?

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So a man walks into a wedding and asks the waiter where the to wait for the punch... the waiter says, "there is no punchline."

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Why arnt black people alowed in bars? Because monkeys don't drink beer! DER DA DER.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

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Whats worse then nailing ten babies to a tree? Nailing one dead baby to ten trees.

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Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

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A moth walks into a podiatrist's office. The podiatrist says, "Moth, what's the problem?" And the moth says, "What's the problem. Well, doc, where do I begin? Every day I get up to another cruel sky. It's like the sun is mocking me as I begin the gruelling preparations for another 8-hours of slogging in meaningless toil for my boss, Gregor McIvanichisky. A grey self, captive in a grey cubicle in a grey office with no windows that I might see the grey clouds beyond... I just sit in my cubicle as I feel the throbbing ache of the best days of my life being raped away into a monotonous, forgettable slurry of irrelevant corporate drudgery. I don't know what I'm doing, I don't think my boss even knows. All he knows is that he has power over me. And my children...my daughter is always on her cellphone, texting and emailing. I haven't spoken real words to her in weeks. My oldest son is never home and when he is, he's locked in his room listening to angry music. My youngest son, he's only 4, I look at him and he asks me to play... and I feel nothing. No love, no tenderness... just a void. And when I look in the mirror...I don't recognize the face staring back at me. It's aged so much from the boyish looks I remember. The years have carved deep lines of despair, worry and anguish. Dark, hollow eyes where once gleamed hope and excitement. Thin lips unable to find the smile of the happy, old days. If only I could find the courage to reach over to the side table and remove the loaded gun. And then find the strength to pull back that hammer as the chamber rotates, clicking solidly into place...Raising it to my temple for the final squeeze that will erase the last shreds of my existence from this cold grave of a life wasted away." And the podiatrist says, "Well, Moth, you're in pretty rough shape. You need to get some help. But why did you come to me? You need a psychiatrist!!" And the moth says... "Because the light was on."

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PEN15 IF U R SMART U WILL UNDERSTAND THIS

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Why did the koala fall off the tree? Because it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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