Why did the retard have no friends? Because somebody stitched his mouth and eyes shut so he couldn't be social.

A man walked into a bar and was then taken away in an ambulance dude to a severe concussion.

What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

Knock, Knock. Who's There? To get to the other side.

What did the rapist say when he spotted the young girl? I am going to rape you!

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

what color is blue? green

Q: What's a fish store with no fish? A: A water store.

What did the gay guy get for Christmas? AIDS

LALALALA MUSIC MACHINE

One day there was a guy who went on a date with a girl. They went to the movies and ate popcorn. After the movie ended they had a candlelit dinner at a restaurant nearby. The guy ordered a fried chicken and the girl ordered a watermelon salad. They went home after a great dinner. I'm not sure how the story ends but I remember the story was racist.

A dyslexic man sells his soul to Santa.

One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

Tim: Jason, your dumb Jason: No I'm not.

Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say mustache? ...No. I wish you had said mustache.

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater.

A bear walks into a bar. Mauls every one in it, then is shot to death by animal control.

Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

whats worse than the holocaust??? finding it in your apple

What do you call a black man flying a plane? Answer: A Pilot

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Knock Knock! we have a door bell ...ding dong. its broken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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