Do you want to hear a knock knock joke? (Yes) Okay, you start. (Knock knock). Who's there? ...

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Why was the deaf boy crying at Christmas? He got an iPod.

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what color is blue? green

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How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

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LALALALA MUSIC MACHINE

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A dyslexic man sells his soul to Santa.

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why did the man walk into the metal pole? because hes blind and suffers from cancer.

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Have you seen Stevie wonder's new mansion? No..... Either has he

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a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

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What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Tie her up and force her to watch as you brutally murder her entire family.

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A bear walks into a bar. Mauls every one in it, then is shot to death by animal control.

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A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? Answer: A Pilot

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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What's worse than 10 babies in one bin? 1 baby in 10 bins.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

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A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

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shabalabadingdong JLR

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Goat balls.

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Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

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Magic Johnson has AIDS

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A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

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How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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