What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

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What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

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Whats black, white, and huge? The world if you are a dog.

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what did the orphan get for Christmas? a family

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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Q. What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? A. Same middle name.

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What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

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Q. What's like a square block of ice? A. A refrigerator.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

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knock knock whos there? doctor doctor who?

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What do you call a black man with a gun? A police officer.

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What did one direction do? Nothing, their music is written by someone else they don't use whatever talent they have and they sound I million dying kittens.

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How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? 1, just because their Jewish doesn't mean their incapable of changing a lightbulb.

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Q- why are anti-jokes funny? A- cuz

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Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

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A joke

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Laura Pratz..

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Why was the girl crying at the dance? Someone shot her.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Women's Rights...

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The Bible

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Murray Harnett Smells like a dirty Burringbar Whore!

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Is your refrigerator running? No. Oh perfect, I'm a refrigerator repairman, I'll be right over.

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A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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