DERP

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A man walks into a bar. The bar tender asks him "why the long face?" He replies "Because I'm a horse, you jackass".

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What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

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Why was the girl crying at the dance? Someone shot her.

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What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

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I love you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Eggplant.

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guess what?

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

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Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

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How many dead babies can u fit in a bath tub 17

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What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple in a car crash.

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I believe you, if something is possible, I know you can do it. I tried lucid dreaming once, but I felt like I began floating and that was no fun, scared me. I am pretty good at hypnotizing others, myself not so much.

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A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

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A Catholic Priest, an Anglican Priest, and a Rabbi were in a train carriage together because they got a package deal to go to a conference on religious tolerance. Good for them.

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I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

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What's more satistfying then good sex? A nice loud, stinky fart.

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A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

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Why do some RVs have 2 doors? Because 11 would be too many.

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"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

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What do you call a Mexican worked with a sweaty singlet? A Wetback

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17 people are eating doritos in a cafeteria. Then, one gets up and throws their bag away. Then the joke ended. Haha it actually didn't.

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Women's rights.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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