A dyslexic man walks into a bar He sits down and has some trouble reading the menu but orders a beer

What do you call a black guy with a shotgun? A fine American citizen exercising his 2nd Amendment right.

Knock knock! Who's there? Fed-Ex. We have a package for you.

Penis.

a fat girl walks into McDonalds....

Why didn't the chicken cross the road... Because he got hurt last week while crossing the road.

how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

Lets see how many dislikes this can get.

What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

What did Joel say to the mouse. We're both dead mouses.

a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

Why did Tina's parents stop calling her? Because they died

why did the arrow hit the knee? the same reason pigs cant fly.

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 killed 6's family

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate poems Penis.

There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

What part of the cape were you on? Cod.

What do you tell a woman with no black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice but you're not an abusive partner.

How did the man rob the bank? With a gun

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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