A dyslexic man sells his soul to Santa.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food there.

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Tie her up and force her to watch as you brutally murder her entire family.

Q: How many vaginas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We know about the cocaine.

a black guy with rights in 1924

What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A dead baby causes years of grief and broken families

What do you call a black man flying a plane? Answer: A Pilot

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

I made a friend today. His name is don. He poops burritos. I like burritos.

Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

Magic Johnson has AIDS

A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

Once upon a time there was beautiful princess, ONCE!

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He didn't have any arms.

4 African men walk into a convientent store, withdrawal 50$ from there primary bank accounts and buy gas for the ride to there jobs at McDonalds

what did the orphan get for Christmas? a family

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

What didn't last long? You in the bed

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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