Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face" the horse says "my son was just diagnosed with multiple sclerosis"

A man is walking down thwe street. All of the sudden, an armoured truck comes around the corner really fast. The back doors swing open, and bags of money fly toward him. "I can believe this is real!" the Man exclaimed. "It's not. Feed the pig." said a man in pig suit with a giant coin-slot on the head.

While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Police. Your mom is dead.

Q:What type of cheese isn't yours? A:NACHO CHEESE!!!!!!!!!

What is the big difference between chopped pork and pea soup? One of them involves the killing of an intelligent animal and the other involves the harvesting of seeds from a non-sentient plant.

Why do some RVs have 2 doors? Because 11 would be too many.

What did the gay guy get for Christmas? AIDS

Want to know who gets head a lot? Balloons

mitt romney

Q. how many Americans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? A. usually it only takes one, but if the ladders is unsteady he might need one or two friends to help hold the ladder

What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

a black guy with rights in 1924

What's the difference between a watermelon and a car? A lot.

Why did the white man win the race Because there were no black people attending

A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

How do you keep a dog from chasing it's tail? cut off it's legs.

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

Why did the priest molest the small boy? Because he can.

Your mother is so fat that she will die relatively early because of poor health.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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