What do you call a mix between a beaver and a mammal? You can't mix beavers and mammals, and even if I had said a platypus that would not have been funny.

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How do you kill a clown shoot it in the face

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Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

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Knock Knock, Come in.

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A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

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How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

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Your mother is so fat that she will die relatively early because of poor health.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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What is bad at catch The twin towers

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WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

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Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

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How do you make a black man cry? Kill his family

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How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

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yo momma's so stupid that she can't support your family, because she can't get a steady job, meaning she does not have money to pay the bills or buy food. This also means you must now get food from your local food bank and sleep on the streets.

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How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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What has lips and smells like a fish? A fish.

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WOMEN'S RIGHTS

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How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

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a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

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Why did the depressed man complain about life? He didn't he committed suicide.):

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What's black and white and red all over? A bleeding penguin.

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ceiling mounted bonerss CC

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They order martinis and have a wonderful time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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