What's brown and sticky? ...poop....and refried beans

What's worse then having Casey Anthony babysit your child? A girl asking, "Is it in?"

Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

Why did the kid want money? So he could buy pokemon cards.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Expensive cheese.

What do superheroes say after they save someone? Whatever the hell they want.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind

Q. Why did the girl fall of the bridge A. Her dad pushed her

The Theory of Relativity, proposed by the Jewish physicist Albert Einstein (1879-1955) in the early part of the 20th century, is one of the most significant scientific advances of our time. Although the concept of relativity was not introduced by Einstein, his major contribution was the recognition that the speed of light in a vacuum is constant and an absolute physical boundary for motion. This does not have a major impact on a person's day-to-day life since we travel at speeds much slower than light speed. For objects travelling near light speed, however, the theory of relativity states that objects will move slower and shorten in length from the point of view of an observer on Earth. Einstein also derived the famous equation, E = mc2, which reveals the equivalence of mass and energy. When Einstein applied his theory to gravitational fields, he derived the "curved space-time continuum" which depicts the dimensions of space and time as a two-dimensional surface where massive objects create valleys and dips in the surface. This aspect of relativity explained the phenomena of light bending around the sun, predicted black holes as well as the Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation (CMB) -- a discovery rendering fundamental anomalies in the classic Steady-State hypothesis. For his work on relativity, the photoelectric effect and blackbody radiation, Einstein received the Nobel Prize in 1921.

Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

An rich man walks into a ghetto and buys something for 1 million dollars. what store was he in? he wasn't in a store,he got robbed

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Eggplant.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have AIDS, Now you do too!

What did the businessman at work do when he found out his wife was cheating on him? He stayed in his cubicle and continued to work, because he was a diligent, hard-working man.

A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

What's a rabbit's favourite food? No-one knows, like humans, every rabbit has it's own favourite food.

What do you call a school bus full of black people? Not a school bus

What did the young girl with leukemia say to a stranger? I am afraid

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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