What's black and white and red all over? A bleeding penguin.

Why did the depressed man complain about life? He didn't he committed suicide.):

What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? Nigger

Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

How did the man rob the bank? With a gun

whats worse than dropping your ice cream down the stairs? dropping your baby down the stairs

What do you tell a woman with no black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice but you're not an abusive partner.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

Are you a homophobe? No I'm straight. ,.

What do you call a dude dinosaur that's into other dude dinosaurs? A Bi-ceritops

Whats similar between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

what do you call a mothers mothers father's brother's son's uncle's sister's brother's aunt's father's stepbrother's granddaughter's mom? I dont know... im asking you, why are you reading the answers then?

The Mets win the World Series

roses are red violets are blue ill cut your dick off and use it as glue

What did the pauper want for Christmas? Money

To girl in a bar: Grab your coat love... It's cold in my basement.

what do you call a muslim flying a plane 911

So, a blind man walks into a bar with assistance from his friend. He orders a drink and the bartender complies. He then spills his drunk and then slips in it. He lays on the floor, his head hurting. He cries, knowing he never should've tried to stare at the sun for ten seconds.

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13.

You have three biscuits. Your friend eats two. How many biscuits do you have? A: 3 Your friend is bulemic so he throws them both up, so you still have them.

make me a sandwich!

Why can't Helen Keller drive a bus? Because she's dead

An Unicorn walks into a club, the bartender promised to quit drugs and thanks to that his family didn't fall apart and he lived happily till he was 89 when he passed away surrounded by loved ones.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...