A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

How do you confuse a blonde? £74.56.5 x 4^4^4^5 (7) : [15(68yf4+s)]

thumb_up thumb_down +52

a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What do u get when you cross Napoleon and a stick of dynamite? A very bloody mess.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

How do you kill a clown shoot it in the face

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He was buried under 6ft of solid earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Your mother is so fat that she will die relatively early because of poor health.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Two peanuts are walking down a dark alley. One was a honey roasted.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's big and black? A black fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what did the orphan get for Christmas? a family

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What is bad at catch The twin towers

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How do you make a black man cry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down +26

WOMEN'S RIGHTS

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What has lips and smells like a fish? A fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

yo momma's so stupid that she can't support your family, because she can't get a steady job, meaning she does not have money to pay the bills or buy food. This also means you must now get food from your local food bank and sleep on the streets.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops