Q. how many Americans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? A. usually it only takes one, but if the ladders is unsteady he might need one or two friends to help hold the ladder

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Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

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What do you call a Mexican worked with a sweaty singlet? A Wetback

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food there.

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What's green and goes "Kablowie!"? Probably nothing.

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Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

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what do you call a black guy on steroids? a black guy on steroids

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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What do you call a mix between a beaver and a mammal? You can't mix beavers and mammals, and even if I had said a platypus that would not have been funny.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a car? A lot.

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Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

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What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

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your mama smells so bad she should probably go take a shower.

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Why did the boy pick up the baseball? He wanted to play baseball.

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How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

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what did the homeless boy do when he saw a cup of water? threw it in someones face

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A Hindu, a Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They then proceed to brutally murder each other due to their strong religious differences.

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Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

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Once upon a time there was beautiful princess, ONCE!

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Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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