All work and no play makes Johnny successful in his field of interest.

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what was the funniest part of the titanic sinking? nothing, many innocent people were killed and left their family devastated.

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Roses are red, violets are blue Vodka is cheaper that dinner for two.

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why did obama become president? people voted 4 him.

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What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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I can't see my forehead

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why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

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What do you call burt and ernie if they were black?? A couple of n*ggers

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What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Penis.

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Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

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Q. What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? A. Same middle name.

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What didn't last long? You in the bed

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What does a car and a t-shirt have in common? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, in fact, the "road" in this joke symbolizes the Mexican/American border. The chicken's real name is Esteban Jimenez and he crossed the "road" to reach his family on the other side so he can start his life over. In addition to this, Esteban's real dream was to establish a 401k and possibly go to law school so he could begin his own law firm.

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what did the orphan get for Christmas? a family

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Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

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Why is the ANTIJOKE symbol 2 mask faces crying? Because some people don't know how to write a good joke.

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What was Michael Jackson doing at the Dermatologist's office? He was getting a mole on his back examined to be sure it wasn't cancer.

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How do you make someone to go away from you? You rap3 them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rap3 him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rap3 him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

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What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? Nigger

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What did the racist guy say at the baseball game? I am at a baseball game.

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Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

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A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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