Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

What does a car and a t-shirt have in common? Nothing.

4 African men walk into a convientent store, withdrawal 50$ from there primary bank accounts and buy gas for the ride to there jobs at McDonalds

What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

a man is found hanging from the ceiling of a barn and there is no chairs or anything to stand on around. his girlfriend goes in to deep depression and kills herself the next week.

A man runs over a woman wth his car. Whose fault was it? The man because he should be driving on the roads, not in the kitchen.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

The AIDS patient was gay

What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

haw are alligators and turtles simaler? They are both reptiles and carnavores and their speaces goes all the way back to the dinosoar ages

What is brown and tasty? A brownie.

Knock knock! Whose there? ... The person who was knocking suffered a fatal shot to the back of the head by a drive by shooter, if the person at the door had just opened it, instead whose there? (...which no one does anyways...) The knocker may have survived. He had a wife and 5 kids, 3 Grandkids.

what did one cow say to the other cow. nothing as its mouth was filled with grass thus it could not speak or it would be deemed as rude.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

Why did the white supremacist stab the black man? He believed his race to be superior to that of the black man, thus he resorted to violence in order to display his supremacy.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

whats worse than dropping your ice cream down the stairs? dropping your baby down the stairs

What did one eye say to the other? Nothing. Because eye's can't talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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