How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

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Where to, sir? Forward.

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Why did the Russian take a boat ride? Well this isn't possible because we all know that in Soviet Russia, boat ride you.

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Like Harry Potter? Like anti-jokes? Check these out: http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38139-why-did-dumbledore-fall-off-the-astronomy-tower-because-snape-killed-him http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38140-knock-knock-who-s-there-you-know-you-know-who-call-him-voldemort-fear-of-a-name-increases-fear-of-the http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38141-a-black-kid-an-asian-kid-and-a-jewish-kid-walk-into-a-barrier-they-are-students-at-hogwarts-school

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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What happened to the cat How should I know it's not my cat

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My nipple is bleeding

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what is the difference between a cow?? there is no difference, you can't make a comparison between different object when there is only one object beïng named.

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Two Mexicans walk into a police station... they don't come out!

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What's my favorite color?? I don't have one, i'm a joke you idiot.

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A man is walking down thwe street. All of the sudden, an armoured truck comes around the corner really fast. The back doors swing open, and bags of money fly toward him. "I can believe this is real!" the Man exclaimed. "It's not. Feed the pig." said a man in pig suit with a giant coin-slot on the head.

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Three men walk into a bar. A fourth man ducks.

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Why was the boy hot? Because he was stuck in an oven.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

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Why did Tigger look into the toilet? He accidentally swallowed a dime the other day and wanted to keep an eye out for it.

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What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

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Q. A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car. Who's driving? A. The police officer

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Hey! i just thought of the funniest joke! okay so it goes like this: A man was walking down the street and saw a bar... he walked in and.... yeah, thats about it.....

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Do you know what's funny about the holocaust? Nothing, it was an unspeakably evil act by a deranged man who should never have been given the power to command a nation

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What's white and red all over? A baby in a blender

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Roses are red, violets are blue Vodka is cheaper that dinner for two.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food there.

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Q: What do you call a midget psychic who escaped from prison? A: His or her name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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