what is the square root of pi? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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I used to love Christmas Until Santa woke me up and told me my dad didn't exist....

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Q:Which side of a chicken has more feathers? A:The outside.

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Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall. First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

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What's the difference between a Satyr play and a Sedar meal? One is full of horned goat-men, the other is a feast that marks the beginning of Passover.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

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A Homosexual, a Jew and a Black walk into a bar. They do not speak make eye contact or acknowledge each other in any way.

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How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

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How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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AND

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

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What did the wannabe mother get for Christmas A miscarriage.

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WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

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Q: How do you get a one armed Pollock out of a tree? A: Call the fire department.

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What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

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I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

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Why don't blind people own cats? They do, who told you that?

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What did the pickle say to the cucumber? I am you from the future!

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What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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w8's white and speaks russian a russian stronk

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What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops