The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. Bartender asks them what they want to drink.

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How are Steve Jobs and the iPhone similar? They both keep getting thinner as time goes on.

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What do gay horses eat? A combination of straw and legumes, much like heterosexual horses do.

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The Bible

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Someone thinks Justin Bieber is strait

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how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

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Why did the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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An armed ninja walks into a bank. He is apprehended by the police, whom he tries to attack with a drawn sword, and is promptly shot down in a hail of gunfire causing civilian injuries and rather significant property damage.

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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Winking at old people

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What's long brown and sticky? S**t

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So this blonde walks into a library.

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Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

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What do you call a Mexican worked with a sweaty singlet? A Wetback

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What's green and goes "Kablowie!"? Probably nothing.

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What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a car? A lot.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He was buried under 6ft of solid earth.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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