Hitler walks into a bar and is shot on sight

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Two guys were sitting in a pub.

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Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? He was shot.

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Whats white and cant jump? A refridgerator.

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whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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Roses are red, Violet are blue. I just thought I'd let you know, But don't worry- this isn't a poem.

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Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

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2+2= 478

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How Long is a Chinese man.

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The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

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Q. What's like a square block of ice? A. A refrigerator.

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The.

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Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, in fact, the "road" in this joke symbolizes the Mexican/American border. The chicken's real name is Esteban Jimenez and he crossed the "road" to reach his family on the other side so he can start his life over. In addition to this, Esteban's real dream was to establish a 401k and possibly go to law school so he could begin his own law firm.

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What did the man say to the other man? Nothing, they didn't know each other..

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So a black guy walks into a bar, respectively pays his tab and walks out.

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knock knock whos there? doctor doctor who?

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your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

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why did the arrow hit the knee? the same reason pigs cant fly.

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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What's worse then having Casey Anthony babysit your child? A girl asking, "Is it in?"

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A black guy gets arrested...

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Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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