How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

haw are alligators and turtles simaler? They are both reptiles and carnavores and their speaces goes all the way back to the dinosoar ages

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock knock! Whose there? ... The person who was knocking suffered a fatal shot to the back of the head by a drive by shooter, if the person at the door had just opened it, instead whose there? (...which no one does anyways...) The knocker may have survived. He had a wife and 5 kids, 3 Grandkids.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the white supremacist stab the black man? He believed his race to be superior to that of the black man, thus he resorted to violence in order to display his supremacy.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats worse than dropping your ice cream down the stairs? dropping your baby down the stairs

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what do you get from sleeping with a hooker? An orgasm

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How is a Jew and a White Person alike. 'cuz you touch yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Madelyn leave the space next ot the computer? Because her hat got tooken from her.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the fat black man call the fatter white man. Because they were good friends and liked to talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than heartbreak? Getting run over by a steamroller.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do gay horses eat? A combination of straw and legumes, much like heterosexual horses do.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

To girl in a bar: Grab your coat love... It's cold in my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down

The

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? The jew is a human being while the pizza is a combination of things such as sauce, bread, cheese and many other toppings made available to the buyer

thumb_up thumb_down

What happened to the man who was raking leaves? He kept his yard clean and felt great about his hard work.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

make me a sandwich!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

there is a man swimming in the ocean with a tree in the ground eating him up so , the cantelope asks the microwave where is the store the microwave says nothing because it is an inanimate object and cannot speak even though the cantelope can which is unfortunate

thumb_up thumb_down -8

how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why does the Easter Bunny deliver chocolate eggs? Because

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A black man without problems.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops