What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Winking at old people

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Q :What do you call a cow running through a field? A: Bob

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Do you know what's funny about the holocaust? Nothing, it was an unspeakably evil act by a deranged man who should never have been given the power to command a nation

thumb_up thumb_down -78

Once upon of time an old man goes to a hospital and tells the doctor that he wants to get circumcised for the first time. The doctor says "Are you sure, you are 90 years old" and the old man says "please doc, just do it." So he goes on with the procedure and the old man is very happy. He returns home with his foreskin and keeps it inside a small box. The old man goes out for dinner and comes home to see his foreskin missing. He gets very angry and asked his daughter "Have you seen my little box?" Daughter says no. He asked his son-in-law "Did you take my box with my foreskin?" Son in law says "No, never." The old man asks the dog "Doggie, did you take my foreskin?" The dog says "Why yes, yes I did." The old man angrily says "Well give it back!" The dog says "I will give your foreskin back if you do me one favor." The old man says "What is it?" The dog says "Three blocks down the street there is a purple house with a cute dog that I would like you to bring to me to go on a date with. Bring her to me and I'll give you back the box." So the old man walks three blocks down the street and spots the purple house. He knocks on the door and a woman opens the door. The old man asks "Excuse me ma'am, i just got circumsized yesterday and I was wondering if I can borrow your dog for just one night because my dog some how blackmailed me and kept my foreskin and said that if I can get my dog and your dog together he would give me my foreskin back." The woman replies " Who the FFFFF are you?!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down +87

What is funnier than shooting a man in the face? Most things, shooting a man in the face is a terrible crime.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

knock knock. who's there myfeth myfeth who myfether came off

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What's the difference between a watermelon and a car? A lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

your mama smells so bad she should probably go take a shower.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call burt and ernie if they were black?? A couple of n*ggers

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A blonde, a brunette, and a ginger all die in a car accident. Their souls all go to heaven. Nevermind, only the blonde, and brunette's souls went to heaven, since everybody knows, gingers don't have souls.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the priest molest the small boy? Because he can.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q. What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? A. Same middle name.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's big and black? A black fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A- Knock knock! B- Come in! A- ...

thumb_up thumb_down +27

WOMEN'S RIGHTS

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Where did little Annie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops