What do u get when you cross Napoleon and a stick of dynamite? A very bloody mess.

what did the black kid get for Christmas? your bike

Four guys walk into a bar. They buy their drinks and stay for a couple of hours. After they are done they get a cab ride home. It was a lovely night.

Penis.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

Three blondes were stuck on an island, one of them wished for a motorboat, later on they all died of starvation

Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

A Hindu, a Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They then proceed to brutally murder each other due to their strong religious differences.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

What do you call a black man without a job? A man disenfranchised by the failing American economy.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, in fact, the "road" in this joke symbolizes the Mexican/American border. The chicken's real name is Esteban Jimenez and he crossed the "road" to reach his family on the other side so he can start his life over. In addition to this, Esteban's real dream was to establish a 401k and possibly go to law school so he could begin his own law firm.

a man killed wife. he successfully rid the scene of all evidence and buried the body under a bridge. unfortunately he forgot to bury the head and went to jail for life.

what's white, sticky, and very fluffy? which can be sweet or bitter, depending on what the person ate. THATS RIGHT. it's CUM. :D

What's worse then a worm in your apple You took a bite outta that apple.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your other apple.

why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

roses are red, Violets are blue, i have a gun, Suck my dick

What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

What's worse than having but sex and finding out you have aids? Knowing that the person you had sex with was dead

How many babies does it take to fill a ditch? Six if you pack them in really tight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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