What did one eye say to the other? Nothing. Because eye's can't talk.

roses are red, Violets are blue, i have a gun, Suck my dick

Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

I know what makes young boys "explode" -dynamite

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

My nipple is bleeding

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

What happened to the cat How should I know it's not my cat

Where to, sir? Forward.

Whats similar between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

apple pie.

noodles

What has an extra toe and is a bad role model for little girls? Miley Cyrus.

Women's Rights...

Q. Wherefore art thou Romeo? A. Global Warming. ,.

What happened to the man who was raking leaves? He kept his yard clean and felt great about his hard work.

What's worse than the conservatives? Nothing, because conservatives fuck everything up.

knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

Knock knock. Who's there? The landlord. You're being evicted.

What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

Why was the deaf boy crying at Christmas? He got an iPod.

What did Obama do when he heard of Bin Ladins death? He informed the nation of what had happend.

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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