Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

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Why did Tigger look into the toilet? He accidentally swallowed a dime the other day and wanted to keep an eye out for it.

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Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

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What's brown? My toilet hahaha

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Q :What do you call a cow running through a field? A: Bob

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Do you know what's funny about the holocaust? Nothing, it was an unspeakably evil act by a deranged man who should never have been given the power to command a nation

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Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

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You and your wife walk into a bar, you both order a drink and celebrate your good health.

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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knock knock. who's there myfeth myfeth who myfether came off

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Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

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Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

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What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

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What do you call burt and ernie if they were black?? A couple of n*ggers

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

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What happened when the tree fell It killed someone

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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Your mother is so fat that she will die relatively early because of poor health.

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Why did the black guy not have friends He was socialy awkward

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A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

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How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

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What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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