What is the big difference between chopped pork and pea soup? One of them involves the killing of an intelligent animal and the other involves the harvesting of seeds from a non-sentient plant.

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its head.

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why did the boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a boat

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

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What's long brown and sticky? S**t

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So this blonde walks into a library.

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Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

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17 people are eating doritos in a cafeteria. Then, one gets up and throws their bag away. Then the joke ended. Haha it actually didn't.

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Q: What do you call a midget psychic who escaped from prison? A: His or her name.

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What is funnier than shooting a man in the face? Most things, shooting a man in the face is a terrible crime.

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knock knock. who's there myfeth myfeth who myfether came off

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Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

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What do you call burt and ernie if they were black?? A couple of n*ggers

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How do you start a Mexican parade? You roll a quarter down a hill

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Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

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Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

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Penis.

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Why did the black guy not have friends He was socialy awkward

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What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

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what did the orphan get for Christmas? a family

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Q. What's like a square block of ice? A. A refrigerator.

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What is bad at catch The twin towers

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A black guy and a Mexican guy opened a restaurant. They were very successful and became the most popular restaurant in town.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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