What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor

Q. Wherefore art thou Romeo? A. Global Warming. ,.

Why did the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus.

Why does the Easter Bunny deliver chocolate eggs? Because

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

Why did Tigger look into the toilet? He accidentally swallowed a dime the other day and wanted to keep an eye out for it.

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

What's long brown and sticky? S**t

What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine [Emo Philips]

wanna hear a joke? no

Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

why did the man walk into the metal pole? because hes blind and suffers from cancer.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Q: What did the Asian say to the Jew? A: Nothing. They were both anti-social and preferred to stray from face-to-face conversations.

You and your wife walk into a bar, you both order a drink and celebrate your good health.

Wanna hear a joke? No.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He was buried under 6ft of solid earth.

What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? ...Finding the same joke int he Inti-Joke.

A blonde, a brunette, and a ginger all die in a car accident. Their souls all go to heaven. Nevermind, only the blonde, and brunette's souls went to heaven, since everybody knows, gingers don't have souls.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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