Why didn't Hellen Keller just wear glasses? Oh wait

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a snake in your liver. Because that could be hazardous to your health.

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this going to be my new text thingy! i dont have a phone! WATS UP!

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Why couldn't the car drive? Because its wheels were made of butter.

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Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

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Why did Tigger look into the toilet? He accidentally swallowed a dime the other day and wanted to keep an eye out for it.

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Do you want to hear a joke about dogs? A joke about dogs.

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This is a joke for Homeless people:

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How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

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What did the Hindenburg say? -nothing it just blew up

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Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

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What can't think, see, hear, taste, or smell? A Headless Cat

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17 people are eating doritos in a cafeteria. Then, one gets up and throws their bag away. Then the joke ended. Haha it actually didn't.

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What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

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What is funnier than shooting a man in the face? Most things, shooting a man in the face is a terrible crime.

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666

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Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

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How do you wake Lady GaGa up? set her alarm for a reasonable hour.

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How do you kill a clown shoot it in the face

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A dead baby causes years of grief and broken families

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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What's worse than 10 babies in one bin? 1 baby in 10 bins.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops