Q. how many Americans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? A. usually it only takes one, but if the ladders is unsteady he might need one or two friends to help hold the ladder

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Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

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What do you call a Mexican worked with a sweaty singlet? A Wetback

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Q: What do you call a midget psychic who escaped from prison? A: His or her name.

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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What's the difference between a baby and a pineapple? Pineapples were not shot by nazis during the holocaust.

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What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

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Popsicles

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Q:Which way do gay people walk? A:In One Direction

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

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Your mother is so stupid that it would be politically incorrect and socially unacceptable to make asinine, derogatory comments about her challenges.

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OMG LOOK I FOUND A MAGIC DECODER RING

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Your mother is so fat that she will die relatively early because of poor health.

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what did the homeless boy do when he saw a cup of water? threw it in someones face

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was wearing a shirt depicting a skull, something six had an irrational phobia of.

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Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

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What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Hoocaust? 3 bee stings.

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Hitler walks into a bar and is shot on sight

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What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

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A fairly-priced Apple computer.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

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The AIDS patient was gay

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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