What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

why did the chicken cross the road? cause it can bitch.

Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

Your momma so fat she can eat 10 of your 300lb friends.

What happens when you cut Chuck Norris? He bleeds

Knock knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Bob Matthews.

Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

And if a chicken had wings it wouldn't bump it's butt when it landed.

Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

Knock Knock Business Man: Who's There? Al Qeada Business Man: Al Qeada who? Al Qeada is flying an airplane into your building Then a commercial airplane flew into the oddly placed door on the 95th floor of the North Tower. That's how 9/11 happened. Have a nice day.

Why was Hitler a bad person? He cheated at boggle.

Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

Whats black and white and red all over? An interracial aborted fetus

P0P T4Rt

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

Whats worse than being a Jew? Being black.

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

Q: what did the boy get for Christmas A: a new wheel chair his legs were recently amputated due to the same cancer that killed terry fox.

What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food there.

Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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