why did Tommy fall of his bike? because he was getting raped by a walrus

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You and your wife walk into a bar, you both order a drink and celebrate your good health.

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Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

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Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

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What do you call burt and ernie if they were black?? A couple of n*ggers

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

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How do you make a chicken laugh. By showing it how to cross the road

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I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

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Your mother is so fat that she will die relatively early because of poor health.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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What happened when the tree fell It killed someone

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Why did the black guy not have friends He was socialy awkward

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A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a ginger all die in a car accident. Their souls all go to heaven. Nevermind, only the blonde, and brunette's souls went to heaven, since everybody knows, gingers don't have souls.

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How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

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How Long is a Chinese man.

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What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

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A- Knock knock! B- Come in! A- ...

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The joke below me is retarded

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A whole family go to a water park. They have a great day.

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What is brown and tasty? A brownie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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