What do superheroes say after they save someone? Whatever the hell they want.

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Do unto others as others would do unto you, said the rapist.

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What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

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How do you get Jack to fall of his bike? Push him off

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What do you call a fish with no eye? A fsh

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Two corpses weigh in the wind. One is called Jones.

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what did one cow say to the other cow. nothing as its mouth was filled with grass thus it could not speak or it would be deemed as rude.

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

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Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Cheese at the grocery store that you have not purchased yet

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A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

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What do you call an Iraqi man steering the plane? a pilot, you racist.

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What starts with "p" and ends with "orn" Popcorn

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What has an extra toe and is a bad role model for little girls? Miley Cyrus.

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13.

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane 911

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What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

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Guess what? SHADAP

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Knock Knock Who's there? Never mind, it's just an imaginary door anyway.

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You have three biscuits. Your friend eats two. How many biscuits do you have? A: 3 Your friend is bulemic so he throws them both up, so you still have them.

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What did Helen Keller get at the store? Glasses

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Do u know what would be a big pain in the ass? A thorn

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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Three men walk into a bar. A fourth man ducks.

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How do you lock out a Chinese Person? Lock the door

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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