why do black people were white shirts?..they feel like it

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Chuck Norris witnessed a crime.What did he really witness? A Jehovah's witness. xD

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A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

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Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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What do you call an Iraqi man steering the plane? a pilot, you racist.

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A man walks into a bar. Inside he finds Hitler, his wife, and an angry badger. They are pleased to see him and they all relate to each other through their shared love of bocce ball.

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What did the mountain biker say when he saw a double rainbow? This a very rare occurrence in nature, and I should enjoy this rare phenomenon.

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Poop.

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a bus? Because she's dead

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How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

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How do you lock out a Chinese Person? Lock the door

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What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

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what color is blue? green

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Two robots are walking down the street together and walk into a bar. Just kidding, they can't walk because they have Polio.

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Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

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wanna hear a joke? no

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Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

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What do you call a Mexican worked with a sweaty singlet? A Wetback

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

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Q: What is creepy and stares at you when you sleep A: Me

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Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

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What do u get when you cross Napoleon and a stick of dynamite? A very bloody mess.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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