There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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A unicorn is walking down the street and a man asks him: "Why so horny" The unicorn then slap the man upside the head because that was none of his business.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

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what do you get from sleeping with a hooker? An orgasm

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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a Jewish preist grew up in a black family. what do you call them? a loving family.

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what's worse than a worm in your apple? The Haulocaust. Whats worse than the Haulocaust? Two worms in your apple.

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What starts with "p" and ends with "orn" Popcorn

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My nipple is bleeding

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Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

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did the dog explode? because it didn't have a bum hole

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What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

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Gay rights

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Chris Hanson with To Catch A Predator.

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Dislike if you're a virgin ;)

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This is a joke for Homeless people:

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why did Tommy fall of his bike? because he was getting raped by a walrus

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Roses are red, violets are blue Vodka is cheaper that dinner for two.

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What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

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Four guys walk into a bar. They buy their drinks and stay for a couple of hours. After they are done they get a cab ride home. It was a lovely night.

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What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Nothing.

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How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

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What do you call burt and ernie if they were black?? A couple of n*ggers

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Put it in the microwave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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