How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them

thumb_up thumb_down -17

If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. Neither of the muffins say anything because muffins can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

There was a buffalo on a farm. The buffalo was slaughtered and then put and a package and sent to people who like the taste of slaughtered, chemical filled buffalo. In other words, people who like buffalo wings.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Womens Sports

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

there is a man swimming in the ocean with a tree in the ground eating him up so , the cantelope asks the microwave where is the store the microwave says nothing because it is an inanimate object and cannot speak even though the cantelope can which is unfortunate

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him access to food stamps

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Libraries.

thumb_up thumb_down -93

Q. What red and scratches glass A. a baby in an oven

thumb_up thumb_down -119

why did Tommy fall of his bike? because he was getting raped by a walrus

thumb_up thumb_down +88

How do you kill a clown shoot it in the face

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the girl fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the black man fall asleep? because he was tired.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops