WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

Two Jews walk into a bar. They order martinis and have a wonderful time.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

What did the Nazi call the Jew? Alex.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Cheese at the grocery store that you have not purchased yet

A priest, a rabbi, and a preacher walk into a bar. They ordered a water each.

how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

why did the chicken cross the road? cause it can bitch.

Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

What did one eye say to the other? Nothing. Because eye's can't talk.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

What's worse than having but sex and finding out you have aids? Knowing that the person you had sex with was dead

What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

Q. What do you call the person that graduated at the bottom of his medical department? A. Doctor

why did Suzy drop her ice cream? doesn't matter, why is she out of the kitchen.

Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being mentally retarded.

Rick Perry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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