What do you call burt and ernie if they were black?? A couple of n*ggers

thumb_up thumb_down +39

a rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A blonde, a brunette, and a ginger all die in a car accident. Their souls all go to heaven. Nevermind, only the blonde, and brunette's souls went to heaven, since everybody knows, gingers don't have souls.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head? a bullet

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q:Which way do gay people walk? A:In One Direction

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A Man visits his Doctor because he is feeling slightly unwell.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

a man walks into a bar and dies

thumb_up thumb_down +31

there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

thumb_up thumb_down +21

The joke below me is retarded

thumb_up thumb_down +17

SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to she him rocking and rocking on it.(:

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what happens when you wake up inception

thumb_up thumb_down +9

whats worse then getting robbed by a black man? -getting hit by a bus due to not having the needed currency to get a ride home

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops