What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Nothing.

A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

A jew, a black man, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Englishman, an American, and a muslim walk into a bar. They discuss their racial, political and religious opinions and walk away after a pleasant evening.

how do you tell a joke on anti-joke? you don't.

Knock knock "Steve I have a door bell."

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because not only was she deaf and dumb, but she was also blind and it's not possible to drive if you are blind.

Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a porch? Bob

Lacrosse

3 guys walk into a bar to tell an anti joke. The bartender asks them to leave.

why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

My nipple is bleeding

Why is justin bieber gay? because he is attracted to men

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

what's worse than a worm in your apple? The Haulocaust. Whats worse than the Haulocaust? Two worms in your apple.

Hi my name is Bob

What do gay horses eat? A combination of straw and legumes, much like heterosexual horses do.

did the dog explode? because it didn't have a bum hole

black

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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