What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

What does Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobil? ... - Come on Robin, let's get into the Batmobil...

A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

What is green, ugly and can't empty his bowels without exerting a tremendous amount of energy? A constipated, ugly, green thing.

I know animal testing is cruel, but my dog did really well on the SATs.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

johann grayson being liked

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your other apple.

How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her.

My nipple is bleeding

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

-Knock Knock -Anthony got in a car crash -Who's There -He died

What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

What's 1+1? 4.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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