Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

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A jew, a black man, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Englishman, an American, and a muslim walk into a bar. They discuss their racial, political and religious opinions and walk away after a pleasant evening.

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A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

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OMG LOOK I FOUND A MAGIC DECODER RING

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a porch? Bob

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

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What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

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Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

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what's white, sticky, and very fluffy? which can be sweet or bitter, depending on what the person ate. THATS RIGHT. it's CUM. :D

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They order martinis and have a wonderful time.

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Yah? Well your a ********

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock Who's there THE CHICKEN

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What is the difference between a Jew and a canoe? A canoe tips.

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

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what do Asian people eat? what Asian people eat.

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Why did the kid want money? So he could buy pokemon cards.

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what did liam weir ask ethan. how much charge do you have

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Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

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How are Steve Jobs and the iPhone similar? They both keep getting thinner as time goes on.

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A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops