A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

That awkward moment were your giving your girlfriend a blowjob then you realize your giving your girlfriend a blowjob.

A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

How do porcupines have sex? The male begins by urinating all over the female. He then enters her from behind and proceeds to thrust until the act is completed.

Once upon a time, there was a potato named Ollie. Ollie was confused, because potatoes shouldn't have brains. One day, Ollie fell madly in love with a refridgerator named Bob. Chick-Fil-A killed both of them for being homosexuals. Chick-Fil-A then ate some Oreoes. The end.

What did one pole say to the other pole? We are both from poland

Where to, sir? Forward.

A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Cheese at the grocery store that you have not purchased yet

Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to she him rocking and rocking on it.(:

whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a picnic table? The average picnic table can support a family of four, while a Mexican person, depending on his or her career, can support families that include over four people.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

My cousins so stupid she makes straight A's

What happened to Kim when she went swimming? She didn't, she doesn't know how to swim.

A man cries out to god.. and god doesn't answer.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have AIDS, Now you do too!

if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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