What starts with "p" and ends with "orn" Popcorn

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What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

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My life

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What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have AIDS, Now you do too!

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13.

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what's black, white, and red all over? any red object

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Why does the Easter Bunny deliver chocolate eggs? Because

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Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and was forced to prostitute for money, thus resulting in you.

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Has anyone seen Stevie Wonder's new car?! Nobody seen it?! He too!

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"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

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Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

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A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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If a stick is sticky and a bat is batty, what is a mountain? A mountain is rocky. Techinically, 'mountainly' is not an official word.

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Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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Why did the boy pick up the baseball? He wanted to play baseball.

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what did the homeless boy do when he saw a cup of water? threw it in someones face

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A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

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Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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