why did the boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a boat

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FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

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What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

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What's white and red all over? A baby in a blender

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

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Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

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What is funnier than shooting a man in the face? Most things, shooting a man in the face is a terrible crime.

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Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

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What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

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How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

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It's funny, because she's twice his size!

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How do you start a Mexican parade? You roll a quarter down a hill

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What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

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a man is found hanging from the ceiling of a barn and there is no chairs or anything to stand on around. his girlfriend goes in to deep depression and kills herself the next week.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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The AIDS patient was gay

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Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

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what's white, sticky, and very fluffy? which can be sweet or bitter, depending on what the person ate. THATS RIGHT. it's CUM. :D

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb? How many? How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb?

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? He was hit by a bus

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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Why do asians have such thin eyes? Genetics

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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