A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

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What did the atheist say when he was in the church? The eulogy for his best friend.

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William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

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how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

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Q:Where does a woman work at if she has 1 leg? A: IHOP!!! :)

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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What do blondes do when they hurt themselves ? They say "Ow", just like anyone else.

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Dislike if you're a virgin ;)

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Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

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This is a joke for Homeless people:

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What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

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doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

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Q. What red and scratches glass A. a baby in an oven

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what did Tyrone get for Christmas he got shot by isis

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What's white and red all over? A baby in a blender

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What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

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Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

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Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

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You and your wife walk into a bar, you both order a drink and celebrate your good health.

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It's funny, because she's twice his size!

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What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

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What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Nothing.

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Why did the boy pick up the baseball? He wanted to play baseball.

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What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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