Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

What's long brown and sticky? S**t

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

Q. What red and scratches glass A. a baby in an oven

what did Tyrone get for Christmas he got shot by isis

Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

Knock knock! Who's there? Wrong house. I apologize.

knock knock. who's there myfeth myfeth who myfether came off

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

You're on fire.

Popsicles

Penis.

Like my status for a tbh?

Knock Knock. Peep Hole!!

Your mother is so fat that she will die relatively early because of poor health.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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