What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? A. It will Wet or Sink, as simple as that.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Doesn't matter, the lightbulb was never out

thumb_up thumb_down -40

mitt romney

thumb_up thumb_down -80

Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

thumb_up thumb_down -82

21

thumb_up thumb_down +109

a rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

why did the shark cross the road It didn't its a shark

thumb_up thumb_down +39

so the guy @ the asian restaurant ask the waiter why his beverage tastes funny and the asian waiter says "It's likely that you are used to classic coke and they changed the formula"

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Magic Johnson has AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A jew, a black man, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Englishman, an American, and a muslim walk into a bar. They discuss their racial, political and religious opinions and walk away after a pleasant evening.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's the difference between Jews, Muslims & Christians? Religious beliefs.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A blonde, a brunette, and a ginger all die in a car accident. Their souls all go to heaven. Nevermind, only the blonde, and brunette's souls went to heaven, since everybody knows, gingers don't have souls.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

shabalabadingdong JLR

thumb_up thumb_down +29

So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

thumb_up thumb_down +27

ceiling mounted bonerss CC

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q- why are anti-jokes funny? A- cuz

thumb_up thumb_down +21

So a black guy walks into a bar, respectively pays his tab and walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the man say to the other man? Nothing, they didn't know each other..

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops