What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where is my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What is funnier than shooting a man in the face? Most things, shooting a man in the face is a terrible crime.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Your mom is so fat she has type 2 diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

a man walks into a bar and dies

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because not only was she deaf and dumb, but she was also blind and it's not possible to drive if you are blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the man say to the other man? Nothing, they didn't know each other..

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man walks into bar. Which is no surprise as he'd been drinking heavily and his spacial awareness was poor at the best of times.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why did the monkey fall out of the tree there was no monkey

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

a woman walks into a stall with her five yr old daughter. as the mom starts to due her buisness the girl looks down and asks her mom "Mommy why do u have a beard on ur pe-pe?"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a fish with no eye? A fsh

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

whats blue and fluffy ? Blue fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why is justin bieber gay? because he is attracted to men

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops