Q - Want to hear a joke? A - Me Too.

A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

That awkward moment were your giving your girlfriend a blowjob then you realize your giving your girlfriend a blowjob.

A black guy and a Mexican guy opened a restaurant. They were very successful and became the most popular restaurant in town.

you.

Me: Knock Knock! You: Door's Open!

What's wrong with the muffler man? his body.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

what did one cow say to the other cow. nothing as its mouth was filled with grass thus it could not speak or it would be deemed as rude.

Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

Hey, you have small hands.

What do a Shark and a lemon have in common? They can both swim, except for the lemon

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Due to Helen Keller's disabilities she wasn't able to own an animal. If she did have a dog, it would be named spot because that was a popular pet name in that period of time.

Oceanic flight 815 crashes on an island and the survivors are stranded. They all die of starvation and dehydration within a week.

how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

Rick Perry.

Someone thinks Justin Bieber is strait

What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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