Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

Why are all black people considered to be relatively fleet of foot as contrasted to other races? Because their gene pool contains a higher frequency for the traits of low body fat and high proportions of musculature.

A man walks into bar. Which is no surprise as he'd been drinking heavily and his spacial awareness was poor at the best of times.

Hitler. lol, sucks.

Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

Gay rights

nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor

Knock knock, Whos there Nig.ger Nig.ger who Fu.ck all nig.gers.

How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

what's black, white, and red all over? any red object

What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...