Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

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SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

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Yo Mama is so fat She wears XL clothes.

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What did the man say to the other man? Nothing, they didn't know each other..

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

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Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

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guess what the quarterback did he threw the ball!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Why did the black man fall asleep? because he was tired.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

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A guy walks into a bar and thinks of a superlative anti-joke. After having an enjoyable time at the bar he then promptly goes home and posts it for the world to see.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

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a Jewish preist grew up in a black family. what do you call them? a loving family.

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a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

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Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

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A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

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My cousins so stupid she makes straight A's

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

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What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

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how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

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William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

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What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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