Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

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Why do asians have such thin eyes? Genetics

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Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

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what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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a woman walks into a stall with her five yr old daughter. as the mom starts to due her buisness the girl looks down and asks her mom "Mommy why do u have a beard on ur pe-pe?"

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Yah? Well your a ********

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Once upon a time, there was a potato named Ollie. Ollie was confused, because potatoes shouldn't have brains. One day, Ollie fell madly in love with a refridgerator named Bob. Chick-Fil-A killed both of them for being homosexuals. Chick-Fil-A then ate some Oreoes. The end.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

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Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to she him rocking and rocking on it.(:

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what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

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Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

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What did the atheist say when he was in the church? The eulogy for his best friend.

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why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

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How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

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a child and his father were on a bike ride the child tried to cross a street but was run over by a truck. His father now lives homeless and griefs his dead son.

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What did charles get his sister for christmas? Nothing, he's dead

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Why couldn't the car drive? Because its wheels were made of butter.

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Q: What's wrong with the world today? A: Everything

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What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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