Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

What is funnier than shooting a man in the face? Most things, shooting a man in the face is a terrible crime.

A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

robin has a boy friend its the green lantern

It's funny, because she's twice his size!

Q: What does DNA stand for? A: National Dyslexic Association

A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

A man walks into bar. Which is no surprise as he'd been drinking heavily and his spacial awareness was poor at the best of times.

What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

Hitler. lol, sucks.

Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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