"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

thumb_up thumb_down -70

3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -118

Whats red and is bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where is my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Why did the milkman wear a white belt? To keep his pants up.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Q: What does DNA stand for? A: National Dyslexic Association

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Where does a hobo live? A box.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because not only was she deaf and dumb, but she was also blind and it's not possible to drive if you are blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A fairly-priced Apple computer.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the chicken cross the road? A manufacturing defect in the chain link fence released several chickens who are now freely roaming the area.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

thumb_up thumb_down +17

knock knock whos there? a rapiest get in my van. ok, let me just get my purse

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? He was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops