You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

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Where did John go? Refrigerator

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Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

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What happened after four homosexual clowns all squeezed into a little toy car simultaneously? Children and parents alike were amazed by this feat, and considered their $5 entrance fee very well spent.

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How do you make a little girl cry? Throw a brick at her face.

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Q: So why does an Asian guy look at these two black guys and a white woman in the middle? A: Because he wants an oreo cookie.

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Your mother is so stupid that it would be politically incorrect and socially unacceptable to make asinine, derogatory comments about her challenges.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We know about the cocaine.

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KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

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What's the diffrence between a pizza and a black man. One is human being while the other is an inanimate food source.

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Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

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Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

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A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

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So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

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Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

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Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

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Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

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Hitler. lol, sucks.

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what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Nobody, you have no friends.

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when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

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Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

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how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops