There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

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Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

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"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

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Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

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How do you make someone to go away from you? You rap3 them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rap3 him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rap3 him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

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Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

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Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

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Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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So a black guy walks into a bar, respectively pays his tab and walks out.

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What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

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Hitler. lol, sucks.

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I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

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A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

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a Jewish preist grew up in a black family. what do you call them? a loving family.

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a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

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My cousins so stupid she makes straight A's

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if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

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why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

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Chuck Norris witnessed a crime.What did he really witness? A Jehovah's witness. xD

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What did the three-leaf clover say to the four-leaf clover? "FREAK!"

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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