Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

Hitler. lol, sucks.

Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

Knock Knock Who's There? Nobody, you have no friends.

Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

Why is justin bieber gay? because he is attracted to men

My nipple is bleeding

Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

Yo mama's so fat, she possesses a Body Mass Index that is above the recommended value for healthy individuals and thus will have a greater risk for heart disease and other related health problems.

Hi my name is Bob

how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

I AM DISSAPOINTED

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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