Q: What do you get when an angry black man walks past you. A: You get a promotion, the black guy was your friend Bob and he had just been suspended for failing to follow police protocol when apprehending a suspect.

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Why did William go home. His mother called and they were having a potroast

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What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

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Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

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I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

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how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Doesn't matter, the lightbulb was never out

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This is a joke for Homeless people:

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

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A chicken and a triceratops walk into a bar. They both immediately recognize each other and start trading anti-jokes, of which no one else in the bar understood, for they are animals, and animals cannot speak. Which brings up the question of how the triceratops and the chicken would communicate in any way that was conversely accurate to how humans would make jokes. Also adding in the fact that they are both from different eras of time, and the people wonder why a triceratops is walking around when they are in fact extinct. Turns out, the triceratops was an animatronic that gained sentience and ran off the set of Jurassic Park IV, a movie production that was not yet announced, as Steven Spielberg was still working on other movies that were more important at the time. The chicken flew in here because he heard the bar was close-by to where he worked, so he decided to drop by after a long Friday. The bartender finally walks up and asks the triceratops, "What would you like?" The triceratops then went on a rampage and killed everyone inside because he was an alcoholic and lost his family because of it, since his ex-wife would be worked to the bone trying to raise his 2 children and adopted platypus son David. He lost everything in the divorce. Why was he in a bar then? I don't know, I can't talk to dinosaurs. The chicken then befriended the triceratops, as the chicken was a secret anarchist who sought to bring down all the stores on the street, as his mother was killed there while trying to cross the street. She fell into a manhole. The chicken and the triceratops then traded usernames on League of Legends then played out that Friday teaming up and taking down Evil. How do they play League if they're animals? Because this whole story is made up and you wasted a good 2-3 minutes trying to read this.

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What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

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Why couldn't johnny go home? Someone commited arsen and burned it down.

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why did obama become president? people voted 4 him.

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there are 2 muffins in an oven they are cooked nicely and served as a tasty dessert

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robin has a boy friend its the green lantern

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It's funny, because she's twice his size!

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so the guy @ the asian restaurant ask the waiter why his beverage tastes funny and the asian waiter says "It's likely that you are used to classic coke and they changed the formula"

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Barack Obama walks into a KKK meeting. Everyone in the meeting is shocked, and no one says a thing out of sheer embarrassment because racism is no longer socially acceptable.

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What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

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A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

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Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

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Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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