What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

what did the beaver so to the rattle snake? snap your bagles

How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him access to food stamps

Politics.

Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

a rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

robin has a boy friend its the green lantern

Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We know about the cocaine.

how do you get 100 dead babies in a bucket? use a blender. how do you get 100 dead babies out of a blender? Doritio's

How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

Whats white and cant jump? A refridgerator.

How Long is a Chinese man.

Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...