So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

How do you make someone to go away from you? You rap3 them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rap3 him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rap3 him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

So a black guy walks into a bar, respectively pays his tab and walks out.

Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

A black person in the NHL

Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

Chuck Norris witnessed a crime.What did he really witness? A Jehovah's witness. xD

how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Q:why did the girl fall off the swing set? A:she had no arms

why did the boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a boat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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