A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

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A Homosexual, a Jew and a Black walk into a bar. They do not speak make eye contact or acknowledge each other in any way.

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What's the diffrence between a pizza and a black man. One is human being while the other is an inanimate food source.

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Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

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Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

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What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

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Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

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Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

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a woman walks into a stall with her five yr old daughter. as the mom starts to due her buisness the girl looks down and asks her mom "Mommy why do u have a beard on ur pe-pe?"

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died

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Hey, you have small hands.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have AIDS, Now you do too!

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A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

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Yo mama's so fat, she possesses a Body Mass Index that is above the recommended value for healthy individuals and thus will have a greater risk for heart disease and other related health problems.

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I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

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Hi my name is Bob

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Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

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Father: Son stop masterbating u might go blind Son: But Dad I'm over here

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What do you call 2 black men next to me. 2 Dead Men

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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What did charles get his sister for christmas? Nothing, he's dead

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a snake in your liver. Because that could be hazardous to your health.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops