Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

what do u call a black person a black person dehh

A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock Who's there THE CHICKEN

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died

Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a picnic table? The average picnic table can support a family of four, while a Mexican person, depending on his or her career, can support families that include over four people.

Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have AIDS, Now you do too!

What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

Chuck Norris witnessed a crime.What did he really witness? A Jehovah's witness. xD

knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a snake in your liver. Because that could be hazardous to your health.

What do you call a black man selling drugs? average

this going to be my new text thingy! i dont have a phone! WATS UP!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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