Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

when two guys walk in somewhere late together you say. hay perv hay ert.

Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

Hey, you have small hands.

A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

Gay rights

What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor

nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

Yo Mamma

Why did the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus.

my names jim haha

What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

Has anyone seen Stevie Wonder's new car?! Nobody seen it?! He too!

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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