Knock knock, Whos there Nig.ger Nig.ger who Fu.ck all nig.gers.

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knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

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"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

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I believe you, if something is possible, I know you can do it. I tried lucid dreaming once, but I felt like I began floating and that was no fun, scared me. I am pretty good at hypnotizing others, myself not so much.

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How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

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What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

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"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

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3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

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Whats red and is bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

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What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where is my tractor?"

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how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

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how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

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What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

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How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

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A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

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Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

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OMG LOOK I FOUND A MAGIC DECODER RING

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What's the diffrence between a pizza and a black man. One is human being while the other is an inanimate food source.

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What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

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Two men walk into a bar, the third man ducks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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