why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

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What is the only thing worse than being a smelly Jew in 1944? Being a Jew in 1944 to hit the showers.

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What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

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Why did William go home. His mother called and they were having a potroast

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Yo Mamma

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What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen my mixtape? It's really FIRE.

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What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Doesn't matter, the lightbulb was never out

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How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

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A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

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Why did the blond jump off the cliff? She was paragliding for her 20th birthday.

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robin has a boy friend its the green lantern

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A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

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Q: What does DNA stand for? A: National Dyslexic Association

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Where does a hobo live? A box.

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A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

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How do you know that your at a gay barbecue? Because, the hot dogs taste like shit!

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Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

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Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

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What's the diffrence between a pizza and a black man. One is human being while the other is an inanimate food source.

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Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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