A jew, a black man, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Englishman, an American, and a muslim walk into a bar. They discuss their racial, political and religious opinions and walk away after a pleasant evening.

What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

America Votes

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? ...Finding the same joke int he Inti-Joke.

Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

Know what's worse than being publicly embarrassed in front of your crush? Jeffrey dahmer

What's wrong with the muffler man? his body.

What did the dog say to its anus? Woof

Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

i like pie

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

pedophile

What did one eye say to the other? Nothing. Because eye's can't talk.

What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

Don't you hate the retarded smart people who think anti-jokes are all about really explaining but adding sarcasm? Yes.

How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being mentally retarded.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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