A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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What did the three-leaf clover say to the four-leaf clover? "FREAK!"

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"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

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What's better than having an iPad? I don't know, I lost both my hands.

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Gay rights

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How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

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What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

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Poop.

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What do blondes do when they hurt themselves ? They say "Ow", just like anyone else.

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why did the boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a boat

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What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

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Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

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how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

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Why didn't Bill go to the party? He wasn't invited.

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Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

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Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

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Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

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Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

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Why did the blond jump off the cliff? She was paragliding for her 20th birthday.

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Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

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Q: What did the Asian say to the Jew? A: Nothing. They were both anti-social and preferred to stray from face-to-face conversations.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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