A blond walks into a bar. She orders a drink.

Q:why did the girl fall off the swing set? A:she had no arms

what's black, white, and red all over? any red object

1 + 1 = ? 2 "No" "what have you been smoking?" "Seriously, 1+1= window" "WTF???"

What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

there are 2 muffins in an oven they are cooked nicely and served as a tasty dessert

What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

You and your wife walk into a bar, you both order a drink and celebrate your good health.

A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

Netball.

A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

Whats white and cant jump? A refridgerator.

whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

How do you kill a black guy? Shoot him in the temple

What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

What did one eye say to the other? Nothing. Because eye's can't talk.

Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

Hitler. lol, sucks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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