Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

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What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

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Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

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when two guys walk in somewhere late together you say. hay perv hay ert.

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Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

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Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

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Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

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A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

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Hey, you have small hands.

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Hey, look over there! It's ur mom!

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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Father: Son stop masterbating u might go blind Son: But Dad I'm over here

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Gay rights

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Yo Mamma

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Why did the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus.

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my names jim haha

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YOLO

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Has anyone seen Stevie Wonder's new car?! Nobody seen it?! He too!

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how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops