What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

A couple arrived at Hospital in less than 3 hours. but actually they wanted to go to the Church...and 3 hours is quite a long time...

What's the diffrence between a pizza and a black man. One is human being while the other is an inanimate food source.

What's the difference between Jews, Muslims & Christians? Religious beliefs.

a fat girl walks into McDonalds....

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

three men walked into a bar, the fourth one ducked

What do you call a black man without a job? A man disenfranchised by the failing American economy.

Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

what is the best thing to do if you are stuck in a cave with ten lions that haven't eaten in ten years? well the lions aren't the thing to worry about because if they have not eaten in ten years then they would have starved to death

What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock Who's there THE CHICKEN

A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...