Why did the girl fall off the swings? She didn't have arms

Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Knock knock, come in.

my names jim haha

A black man without problems.

What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

why did the chicken cross the road? why should a chickens motives be questioned

Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

How do you make a little girl cry? Throw a brick at her face.

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

Whats white and cant jump? A refridgerator.

How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

knock knock whos there? a rapiest get in my van. ok, let me just get my purse

My wife has terminal cancer.

What is the difference between a Jew and a canoe? A canoe tips.

I know what makes young boys "explode" -dynamite

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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