why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

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"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

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what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

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Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? A. It will Wet or Sink, as simple as that.

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how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

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Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

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I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Whats red and is bad for your teeth? A brick.

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-How do you befriend Tom Hanks? -Kidnap his son

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where is my tractor?"

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

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What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Hola.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

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what is the best thing to do if you are stuck in a cave with ten lions that haven't eaten in ten years? well the lions aren't the thing to worry about because if they have not eaten in ten years then they would have starved to death

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A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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