What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

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What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Hola.

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Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

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whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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What's the difference between Jews, Muslims & Christians? Religious beliefs.

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What's the diffrence between a pizza and a black man. One is human being while the other is an inanimate food source.

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3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

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A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

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So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

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how do you own a ginger? you don't nobody wants them.

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

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Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

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Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

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How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

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Women's Rights

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Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

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Q - Want to hear a joke? A - Me Too.

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A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

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Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

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Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

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3 guys walk into a bar to tell an anti joke. The bartender asks them to leave.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops