Hey, you have small hands.

Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

And if a chicken had wings it wouldn't bump it's butt when it landed.

A man walks into a bar. Inside he finds Hitler, his wife, and an angry badger. They are pleased to see him and they all relate to each other through their shared love of bocce ball.

What do you call 2 black men next to me. 2 Dead Men

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

why did the chicken cross the road? it was in a refrigerated freight truck en-route to its destination.

what's black, white, and red all over? any red object

Q:why did the girl fall off the swing set? A:she had no arms

1 + 1 = ? 2 "No" "what have you been smoking?" "Seriously, 1+1= window" "WTF???"

why was the man sad? His mom was killed in a car accident. His wife commited suicide? His kids were drowned in the bathtub by their mother before she commited suicide. But he was sad because he forgot to take his depression medication.

What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

what did the beaver so to the rattle snake? snap your bagles

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

You and your wife walk into a bar, you both order a drink and celebrate your good health.

Netball.

What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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