A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Gay rights

Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

A man gets into a joan Battle. He says Lamboguini Mercy your chick so thirsty then his pponent says Shut up Your chick is thirsty beacs yours face looks like a dried orange The man runs away Then the opponent realizes His Girlfrienn just aked Him for some water

why did the chicken cross the road? it was in a refrigerated freight truck en-route to its destination.

A blond walks into a bar. She orders a drink.

What do blondes do when they hurt themselves ? They say "Ow", just like anyone else.

Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

Two robots are walking down the street together and walk into a bar. Just kidding, they can't walk because they have Polio.

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

Hey hey what did the bald man say to brian moccia? lOL!

Have you seen Stevie wonder's new mansion? No..... Either has he

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

there are 2 muffins in an oven they are cooked nicely and served as a tasty dessert

Why do black people love menthol? Nobody knows.

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

minorities

Q: So why does an Asian guy look at these two black guys and a white woman in the middle? A: Because he wants an oreo cookie.

Barack Obama walks into a KKK meeting. Everyone in the meeting is shocked, and no one says a thing out of sheer embarrassment because racism is no longer socially acceptable.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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