What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

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What do blondes do when they hurt themselves ? They say "Ow", just like anyone else.

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Dislike if you're a virgin ;)

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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why do giraffes have long necks? because their heads are a long way from their bodies

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

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Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

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How do you make a little girl cry? Throw a brick at her face.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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Q: What does DNA stand for? A: National Dyslexic Association

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Q: So why does an Asian guy look at these two black guys and a white woman in the middle? A: Because he wants an oreo cookie.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

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Knock Knock. Peep Hole!!

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

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whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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Whats white and cant jump? A refridgerator.

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Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

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1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

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I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops