what's black, white, and red all over? any red object

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

thumb_up thumb_down -124

here's a joke: Ron Paul: Hope for America

thumb_up thumb_down +99

What do you call a pencil made entirely of steel? I dont know, i dont name my pencils.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Netball.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

I like boys!!!!! CC

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

a guy walks into a bar. unexpectedly, a terrorist walks in and shoots him in the head. After lots of therapy he can now go back to his average life.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

So - this baby seal walked into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Hey, you have small hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats a cat? A cat!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is Mario's favorite food? I don't know. You should ask him.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops