Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

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I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

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Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

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Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

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A Pole walks into a Pole. They chatted for a while, talking about the good old times they had had together in Poland. They soon finished their conversations, and went seperate ways.

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Yo mama's so fat, she possesses a Body Mass Index that is above the recommended value for healthy individuals and thus will have a greater risk for heart disease and other related health problems.

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Hi my name is Bob

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What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

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What did the three-leaf clover say to the four-leaf clover? "FREAK!"

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Q:Where does a woman work at if she has 1 leg? A: IHOP!!! :)

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a snake in your liver. Because that could be hazardous to your health.

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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Knock,Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you going to let me in?

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Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

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what did the beaver so to the rattle snake? snap your bagles

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How do you fit three gay men on a stool? You don't, that would be very uncomfortable.

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You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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