Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? A. It will Wet or Sink, as simple as that.

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

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Why was the mother crying Her son was killed by a meteor

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Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? “How was your day?“

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

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Knock Knock. Peep Hole!!

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A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

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What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

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A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

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Diana and victoria

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Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

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Walk in to a room and sing "if you're deaf and you know it, clap your hands!"

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Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

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Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

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What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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I AM DISSAPOINTED

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why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

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What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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