What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

here's a joke: Ron Paul: Hope for America

A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Barack Obama walks into a KKK meeting. Everyone in the meeting is shocked, and no one says a thing out of sheer embarrassment because racism is no longer socially acceptable.

What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

Magic Johnson has AIDS

a man walks into a bar and dies

Diana and victoria

Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

Knock Knock! Come in.

So a black guy walks into a bar, respectively pays his tab and walks out.

A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

Whats a cat? A cat!

what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

Hey, you have small hands.

Hey, look over there! It's ur mom!

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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