a man killed wife. he successfully rid the scene of all evidence and buried the body under a bridge. unfortunately he forgot to bury the head and went to jail for life.

A duck walks up to the lemonade stand. The man running the stand then smiles with a tear in his eye as he is reminded of when he and his now dead parents used to feed the ducks at a nearby lake every Sunday afternoon.

Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

when two guys walk in somewhere late together you say. hay perv hay ert.

Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody. You'reschizophrenic and are hearing things. Go see a doctor. Now.

I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

- Why did the black man turn off the TV when he saw 2 guys kiss each other? - He was late to the gay-party around the corner.

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

how do you make a fat black man cry? Rape his wife.

how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

Q:Where does a woman work at if she has 1 leg? A: IHOP!!! :)

Do u know what would be a big pain in the ass? A thorn

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...