Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

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a woman walks into a stall with her five yr old daughter. as the mom starts to due her buisness the girl looks down and asks her mom "Mommy why do u have a beard on ur pe-pe?"

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Why do black people like chicken? It's usually fried.

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why do black people were white shirts?..they feel like it

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

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What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

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how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

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Q:why did the girl fall off the swing set? A:she had no arms

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Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

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A bass player walks past a bar. What? It could happen.

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Your momma so fat she can eat 10 of your 300lb friends.

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What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

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A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

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Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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