why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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How many fairies does it take to screw in a light bulb? If you still believe in fairies, there's something wrong with you.

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why did the chicken cross the road? why should a chickens motives be questioned

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

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What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

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Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

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Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

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What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

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A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: Yes. A: Thanks.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The customers observing this quickly leave because the bartender is talking to a horse, which does not talk.

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What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

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how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

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Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

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Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

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Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

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Joey and Haley have sex; what does he say to her the next morning? Happy 6th birthday daughter.

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A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

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In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

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SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

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Hitler. lol, sucks.

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Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody. You'reschizophrenic and are hearing things. Go see a doctor. Now.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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