why did the shark cross the road It didn't its a shark

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My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

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What's the diffrence between a pizza and a black man. One is human being while the other is an inanimate food source.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

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Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

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What do you call a black guy with a shotgun? A fine American citizen exercising his 2nd Amendment right.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

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SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

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Knock Knock! Come in.

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Walk in to a room and sing "if you're deaf and you know it, clap your hands!"

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody. You'reschizophrenic and are hearing things. Go see a doctor. Now.

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Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

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- Why did the black man turn off the TV when he saw 2 guys kiss each other? - He was late to the gay-party around the corner.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

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What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

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Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

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a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

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Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

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Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

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how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

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knock knock. no one's home..

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What did the genie say to the frog? Go home.

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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