A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

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What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

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when two guys walk in somewhere late together you say. hay perv hay ert.

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Your mother is so fat.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

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Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

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A black guy and a Mexican guy opened a restaurant. They were very successful and became the most popular restaurant in town.

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How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody. You'reschizophrenic and are hearing things. Go see a doctor. Now.

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roses are red violets are blue the stems are green they smell good

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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Why do black people like chicken? It's usually fried.

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a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

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I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

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So much oil was spilled into the ocean that it is killing animals.

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Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

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Q: What do you get when an angry black man walks past you. A: You get a promotion, the black guy was your friend Bob and he had just been suspended for failing to follow police protocol when apprehending a suspect.

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor

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Why did William go home. His mother called and they were having a potroast

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What's worse then Obama? Nothing

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Yo Mamma

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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