Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

I have a knock knock joke. You start.

A unicorn is walking down the street and a man asks him: "Why so horny" The unicorn then slap the man upside the head because that was none of his business.

Q: Why'd the chicken cross the road? A: to get to the other side

How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

Why did the black man fall asleep? because he was tired.

Zach Murfitt has a small Willy!

Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her.

Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

roses are red, violets are red, bushes are red, flowers are red, trees are red, my garden is red... HOLY CRAP MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!

knock knock. no one's home..

How do you get a black person out of a tree? You grab a ladder and help them down.

how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

Lizards are like marshmellows. If you put them in the microwave they blow up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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