why does the octopus have no friends? because they're anti social by nature

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Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

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how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

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Diana and victoria

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1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

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Why did the white supremacist stab the black man? He believed his race to be superior to that of the black man, thus he resorted to violence in order to display his supremacy.

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if i'm white and you're white, then who took my car keys?

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A girl walks into a bar she is then drugged, raped and left in a back alley. To this day she still has psychological issues that are directly related to this event

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

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Yo mama's so fat, she possesses a Body Mass Index that is above the recommended value for healthy individuals and thus will have a greater risk for heart disease and other related health problems.

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How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

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A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

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Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

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Q: How many Chuck Norrises does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: negitave 999999999999999999e

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Yo Mamma

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Knock,Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you going to let me in?

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my names jim haha

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I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

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Why did the baby die? It got shot.

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What do you call a pencil made entirely of steel? I dont know, i dont name my pencils.

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What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

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What's worse then finding out that your partner has AIDS? I don't know actually, but finding out would suck pretty bad...

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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