Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

how do you make a janeter cry, you shit on the floor

thumb_up thumb_down +33

a fat girl walks into McDonalds....

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why do Jews hate hitler? They are jealous of him.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

thumb_up thumb_down +27

clamidia

thumb_up thumb_down +27

why does the octopus have no friends? because they're anti social by nature

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats the difference between black and white? nothing,because in art they are just shades.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

66

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Who owns the streets of Comton The mayor

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

i like pie

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

QUESTION: Why do black people do so poorly in school? ANSWER: Some statistics point to genetic disparities in intelligence between races, but others say it is due to more complicated social factors.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the police officer say to the boy in the park? your parents were killed in a car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's green and has four wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the girl fall off the swings? She didn't have arms

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: How many Chuck Norrises does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: negitave 999999999999999999e

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops