What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

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Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

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Who owns the streets of Comton The mayor

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

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What's sadder than the Holocaust? Not a lot of things because it was probably one of the most depressing series of events that happened in the 20th Century.

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Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

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How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

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What's green and has four wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Q: How many Chuck Norrises does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: negitave 999999999999999999e

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What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

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What's worse then burning in hell for eternity? Well, a lot considering hell is a made-up place.

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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What did the man do after a bad day at work? He went home and beat his wife

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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So its 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar....I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ends up getting nuked.

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Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

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Joshua Brown was in a dark forest, with a misty haze surrounding him. He turned quickly and flicked his hair out of his face. Dylan Hodge appeared and they had wild sex all night!

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whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

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What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why do black people love menthol? Nobody knows.

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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