A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

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Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

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yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

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Once upon a time a girl took a gun and shot herself in the face

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Why was little timmy's arm crooked His mom tried to pull his arm off.

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Why did the man mysteriously disappear? Because he was hiding without telling anyone that he was hiding.

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What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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Skittles are tasteless. Why? You can't taste the rainbow.

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What happens when some one breaks apart your little brother's lego tower? You have a screaming little brother and a bunch of legos all over the floor.

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What did the homeless get for Christmas? Nothing By Nathaniel c

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Why did Aodhan not come into school? He was sick.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating on the water? Dead.

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What do you call a man with a cigar in his mouth. A person with bad health and dirty teeth.

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Gale swallows.

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Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

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knock knock. I have a doorbell, you don't have to knock.

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My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

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Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

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A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

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Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

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Whats 9+10? 19

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A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

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What's the difference between a red cube and a green cube? Nothing, I'm color blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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