why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

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Yo momma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said, "What a treasure!" and her father said, "Yea, let's go bury it!"

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your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

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how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Why can't women drive? Actually, they can as long as they legally acquire a driver's license and have no existing restrictions.

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GONNA

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What is even bigger than an elephant? A gi-ant! (Wait you did say an anty joke right!?)

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Q: what do you call a person who's ass is dumb A: a dumbass

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Why is this website funny? Because it has jokes on it.

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Why is ur cousin gay? because ya dad

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A bass player walks past a bar. What? It could happen.

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2 guys are best friends from birth, one goes crazy and kills the others family and feel hatred towards each other for eternity.

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How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? 10 because they're so darn stupid!

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What do you call an Italian baby born with an extra toe? He was named Vincent Antonio Linguini and has been doing well with six toes.

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Nice legs....What time do they open?

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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( I PLAYED SKRILLESX's SONG ON MAX VOLUME ) My neighbours loved? this so much they invited the police round!

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

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What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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