What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A blond and a brunette took an IQ test. Both of them scored above average.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a man with three testicles? Polyorchid. Look it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Knock Knock Who's there? Father Dougal Mcguire

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q:Who has the highest K/D ratio in Call of Duty World at War A: Hitler, 6000000/1

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Will you marry me? No, I'm cake.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Amblyopsidae, or blindfish, commonly found in caves where they are well adapted to life in the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the horrors of factory farming.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

you know what they say... hydrate or die

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I'm getting tired of nazi jokes. ANNE FRANKly I'm quite offended

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what did batman Say to robin before they got into the car? get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops