How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

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What's sadder than the Holocaust? Not a lot of things because it was probably one of the most depressing series of events that happened in the 20th Century.

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all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

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How did the little boy survive war? He respawned at his teams side of the map

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

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123457

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen my mixtape? It's really FIRE.

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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A man gets into a joan Battle. He says Lamboguini Mercy your chick so thirsty then his pponent says Shut up Your chick is thirsty beacs yours face looks like a dried orange The man runs away Then the opponent realizes His Girlfrienn just aked Him for some water

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give my joke a thumbs up Please!!!

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A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

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A Jewish man joins the German Army. He serves with distinction during the First World War, receives several commendations for bravery, and is one of the 12 million people killed during the Holocaust.

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

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Asian NASCAR.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I got a terminal disease and I'm going to die in six months. Mom if you're reading this I love you. Take good care of Joey.

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Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

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Why didn't the man enter the bus driven by a black man ? It wasn't going where the man had to go.

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Your mother is so stupid that it would be politically incorrect and socially unacceptable to make asinine, derogatory comments about her challenges.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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