Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Adolf Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken decided go get cigarettes and then hang out at a bar. The chicken sitts next to horse, the horse says "Why the sad face?" The chicken justs sitts there, thinking about the insanity that he has caused. "I don't know, is my joke not getting old?" Replied the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A barrel of monkeys is only a barrel of laughs if they're alive and telling jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you kill Michael Jackson? You don't he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A teenage boy walks into a bar, he doesn't even know he's slowly drinking his life away

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why do black people always say to the left to the left... because they don't have rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

So there is a white guy and a jewish guy walking, they find a penny on the ground who takes it? The white guy because he is in debt.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

a young mother calf named near reality was milking itself and selling it at pathmark everyday for high prices he got a lot of money out of it and bought a big mansion where he also had a farm and collected prize show cows to show off to all of his cow friends.... he also bought gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons of prize show cow milk to drink to and build up energy for the cow show race coming up in the near fall. Every sunset he buys loads of milk to drink and feed his plants with. He plants lots of grass every day to eat and produce high quality milk goods. He was a wii, ps3, and xbox360 to play everyday and excercise his udder milk.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

2 guys are best friends from birth, one goes crazy and kills the others family and feel hatred towards each other for eternity.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods They both have beards... EXCEPT FOR TIGER WOODS.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +72

Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Christians

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Two cannibals are eating around a fire in the jungle, and one turns to the other and says "Does this taste funny to you?" Oh yeah, and they're eating a clown.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

i like pie

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops