Q: How many Chuck Norrises does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: negitave 999999999999999999e

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He was Jewish.

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What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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What did the man do after a bad day at work? He went home and beat his wife

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

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Joshua Brown was in a dark forest, with a misty haze surrounding him. He turned quickly and flicked his hair out of his face. Dylan Hodge appeared and they had wild sex all night!

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whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

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Why do black people love menthol? Nobody knows.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Knock knock whos there? me oh, cool... well come in.

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Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride in a poop poop fart turd fart, dildo

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clamidia

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How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

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girls basketball

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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What has five balls and hates Mexicans? The lottery.

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Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

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What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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