Why is ur cousin gay? because ya dad

A woman is about to buy a house and is faced with a difficult decision. She must choose which house she'll buy the next day. During the night she thinks about it and the next morning she has made a rational decision. What house did she choose ? TRICK QUESTION - Women can't make rational decisions.

give my joke a thumbs up Please!!!

What did Elvis say when he lost his voice? Nothing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I got a terminal disease and I'm going to die in six months. Mom if you're reading this I love you. Take good care of Joey.

A black man, a Jewish man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They are all good friends who want to enjoy drinks together.

Why was the chicken mad? Because he was sick of everyone questioning him even when he crossed the road.

Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

Knock Knock. Whos there? Victor. Victor who? Victor Secret, the gay door to door lingerie salesman. Can i interest you in a plastic cup holder?

what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone? A. He got attacked by a dog.

Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

What do you call a black man in a suit? A lawyer.

What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

What has 4 legs and doesn't bark? A dead dog.

96

I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...