19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

What is the similarety between a car and a banana? Both starts with B

Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

How do you occupy a blonde for hours ? Give her a long list of stuff to do.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! That is a joke which very few people would find even mildly entertaining.

What color is a banana? yellow.

What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

What a vase and a cheeseburger have in common? It has it's price.

A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

when god gives you lemons, you find a new god!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

Chikin nuggets

Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

womens sports...

Johny wanted a pogo stick for his birthday. Johny's mom got him a pogo stick for his birthday. The day of Johny's birthday, he fell off the pogo stick and broke his arm.

"The lack of a punch line is the punch line" Oh

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Your mother." "Your mother who?" "Really?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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