Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

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A guy vociferiously kills another person- fueled by the incentive of personal gain provided by his rapacious, human nature. He is an army soldier who's triumphant in battle and hoping to recieve a promotion. However, ultimately all he did was essentially insignificantt and his acts of purported valor were diametrically unnoticed by all except for his closest friends/allies. He never did supass his original self of a soldier and died of a natural cause that was disclosed only to the members of his immediate family.

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2+2= 478

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A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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Chikin nuggets

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how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

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A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because potatos are invading russia

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What's the difference between black people and white people? Their skin color.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

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Yo mama so stupid she liked this joke

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19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

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What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

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What do u call a guy that loves the color blue? A smurf

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Bill is walking down the street when a girl who had a crush on him 20 years ago sees him, goes up to him, and says, "I think I know you, what is your name?". Bill says, "Timmy," and keeps walking because he is an asshole.

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123457

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Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm afraid of toasters.

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What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

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Why did the fireman wear suspenders? To keep his pants up.

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Oh my god it's the twinkie mobile!

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What did it say in the end of the book? The End.

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What do you call a pig standing on its back legs? Yo mama

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What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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