What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The brunette and the redhead escape, but the blonde is captured. Why? Because she had a prosthetic leg sustained from a previous injury, and thus couldn't run very fast.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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Gay jokes are a real pain in the butt.

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

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A blond and a brunette took an IQ test. Both of them scored above average.

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Diana and victoria

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Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

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What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

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what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

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Ran into my ex last night, so I put my truck in reverse and did it again.

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Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

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What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

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Yo mama so stupid she liked this joke

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What do u call a guy that loves the color blue? A smurf

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the horrors of factory farming.

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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Even though Jenny was retarded, her parents didn't love her any less than the family dog.

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Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

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On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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