Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

Hey hey what did the bald man say to brian moccia? lOL!

whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

Asian NASCAR.

What happened to the power lifter that tried to deadlift 920 lbs while wearing nothing but his briefs? he succeeded because he is trained power lifter.

What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

What's worse then finding out that your partner has AIDS? I don't know actually, but finding out would suck pretty bad...

A hayride would be fun.

A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fsh

how do you make a janeter cry, you shit on the floor

What's big, white and will killl you if it falls out of a tree? A polar bear.

Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

Q: What do African Americans and Doorknobs have in common? A: Before the Emancipation Proclamation was passed, neither was free. Doorknobs still aren't free.

Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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