What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

-Knock Knock -Anthony got in a car crash -Who's There -He died

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Due to Helen Keller's disabilities she wasn't able to own an animal. If she did have a dog, it would be named spot because that was a popular pet name in that period of time.

Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

Chuck Norris was walking down the street when he was confronted by an armed, very desperate street robber. Chuck unfortunately made the decision to defend himself, and was shot in the gut before he could complete a roundhouse kick. The robber then took his wallet and ran off, undoubtedly to buy drugs.

What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

Why didn't the man enter the bus driven by a black man ? It wasn't going where the man had to go.

What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? Prosthetic arms.

What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

A black man, a mexican man and a chinese man all walk into a supermarket. Together, they purchase ingredients to make a delicious vegetarian lasagna. That night, they make the lasagna and greatly enjoy it together.

Hi

Miami Heat.

Are you a homophobe? No I'm straight. ,.

What is the difference between a monkey and a pig? A monkey doesn't snort drugs.

Why was it so easy for Superman to pick up chics? His butt ox.

What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

What does spongebob do to get high. Nothing, spongebob doesnt exsist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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