Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

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Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

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What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

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Your mommas so poor she can't afford food for her child. Thats you.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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Rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub, and one was Sandusky.

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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Women deserve equal rights... April fools.

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Why is this website funny? Because it has jokes on it.

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What is even bigger than an elephant? A gi-ant! (Wait you did say an anty joke right!?)

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If you live in the 'living' room, what do you do in the others? You die.

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That's as gay as AIDS.

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9/11

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I like turtoes.

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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Q:Want to hear a pizza joke? A: Never mind it's to cheesy.

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What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

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What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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