Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

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What do u call a guy that loves the color blue? A smurf

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

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Man 1: What kinds of phones do snails use? Man 2:I don't know, I don't think they do. Snail: The snail said nothing, snails don't speak.

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What is the punchline of this joke? There isn't one.

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

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Why was John the octopus depressed? Because his real name was Steve, and he couldn't communicate this to anyone since he lacked the higher brain functions and vocal chords required to do so.

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How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Why is ur cousin gay? because ya dad

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS. AIDS is worse.

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I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

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How many stripes does a Zebra have? Doesn't matter millions of people died in the Holocaust

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What do you call a pencil made entirely of steel? I dont know, i dont name my pencils.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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A jew, a catholic, and a muslim walk into a bar. Within minutes, they begin to argue about religion. After a few hours of intense debate, all three left dissatisfied and upset.

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your mom

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Knock knock whos there? me oh, cool... well come in.

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minorities

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Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

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Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride in a poop poop fart turd fart, dildo

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Knock, knock Who's there? Who. Who who? ... Who?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops