I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

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Asian NASCAR.

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What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

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Whats yellow and shaped like a banana? Bananas

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A hayride would be fun.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

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A Mexican, and Arab and an American are on a plane. The the plane is going down. It hits a mountain and crashes. But there was also a lot of other people on the plane. Families, children, loved ones. It was huge a disaster.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was dead and therefore unable to escape the Chick fil A bag it was being carried in.

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Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fsh

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The NBA lockout

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You are such a loner nothing even clings to you, not even plastic wrap!!

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why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

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66

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96

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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i like pie

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What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

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What do u call a guy that loves the color blue? A smurf

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops