Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Miami Heat.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why could'nt Boris fit in with the other kids? His name was Boris.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a small weapon used by northern russians? A Gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

thumb_up thumb_down -1

God said "let there be light" Chuck Noris said "say please

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a three legged man? Horribly deformed

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because they're humans and many humans enjoy the savory taste of fried chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

thumb_up thumb_down +54

A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

thumb_up thumb_down +48

How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

minorities

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down +34

what did max say to shelby? I hate black people.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Itookasipasoda

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

wanna hear a joke? womens rights!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops