What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

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Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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Whats green and tasty? Snot

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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Q: Whats Faster than a bullet A: A Jew chasing coin

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

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The NBA lockout

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

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What makes fat kids laugh? Jokes.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken decided go get cigarettes and then hang out at a bar. The chicken sitts next to horse, the horse says "Why the sad face?" The chicken justs sitts there, thinking about the insanity that he has caused. "I don't know, is my joke not getting old?" Replied the chicken.

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What do u call a guy that loves the color blue? A smurf

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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anti-joke teehee

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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Why did Dave buy a playstation? Because he wanted one.

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How did the little boy break his arm? He was trampleed by elephants.

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops