What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How many stripes does a Zebra have? Doesn't matter millions of people died in the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -70

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -80

One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +125

Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Wumbo

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Welcome to Watchmojo dot com and today we'll be talking about the Top 10 numbers from 1 through 10. In this episode we will be discussing which numbers from 1 to 10 gain popularity and mainstream appeal amongst people from all over the world. Number 10. 10 (Ten) Number 9. 6 (Six) Number 8. 8 (Eight) Number 7. 4 (Four) Number 6. 5 (Five) Number 5. 3 (Three) Number 4. 2 (Two) Number 3. 9 (Nine) Number 2. 7 (Seven) Here are some honorable mentions: 3.14 9.9 1 and a half Number 1. 1 (One)

thumb_up thumb_down +21

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why is billy g is really supid because he gets bad grades

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Ran into my ex last night, so I put my truck in reverse and did it again.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the white supremacist stab the black man? He believed his race to be superior to that of the black man, thus he resorted to violence in order to display his supremacy.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock, knock. Who's there? Warenth Gibson. Warenth Gibson who? Warenth Gibson. What part of that don't you get?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

two muffins were in an oven. one muffin says, "gee, its hot in here." the other one says, "AH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

And if a chicken had wings it wouldn't bump it's butt when it landed.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops