Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they are not, they are purple. Whoever the uneducated idiot was who made up that poem deserves nothing more then a slap in the face

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a Jew had a small nose

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What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

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Your mama is so poor that she is on welfare, but she is ashamed to tell you and cries herself to sleep every night.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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wanna hear a joke? womens rights!

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A man comes home late from work what does he find? His wife and children murdered.

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A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

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why did the boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a boat

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What did the man say to the other man? yummmmm

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Once upon a time a girl took a gun and shot herself in the face

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A car that is driving recklessly and happens to have a Christmas paint scheme.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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Whats the worst thing that happened in the holocaust? it ended

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A Woman out of the kitchen

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A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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