A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Your mother." "Your mother who?" "Really?"

What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

You might be redneck if you are... Indian

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman... They all died in a horrible train wreck.

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

why cant the black guy vote? because hes not 18 yet.

what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

A man walks into a bar. Inside he finds Hitler, his wife, and an angry badger. They are pleased to see him and they all relate to each other through their shared love of bocce ball.

Two guys walk in to a bar the third one ducks.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The pizza guy. Your pizza's here.

Have you seen stevie wonders house? Nope... Neither has he

What do you call a three legged man? Horribly deformed

Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

Libraries.

When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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