How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Who. Who who? ... Who?

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You are such a loner nothing even clings to you, not even plastic wrap!!

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why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

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wanna hear a joke? womens rights!

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What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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So - this baby seal walked into a club.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

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Miami Heat.

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

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What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face", the horse replies I have an extra 21st chromosome.

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What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

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why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

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Arent you my dark knight in black armor, you would seriously put your life on the line for my sake?

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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what has legs but can't walk? a paraplegic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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