Why do we have a black president? Because the populace voted and thought him to be an overall better candidate than John McCain.

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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I can see you under there. Under what?

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What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

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What do you call 12 ghosts? A bus accident.

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

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what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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Q: What do African Americans and Doorknobs have in common? A: Before the Emancipation Proclamation was passed, neither was free. Doorknobs still aren't free.

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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What did the police officer say to the boy in the park? your parents were killed in a car accident.

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What happened to Kim when she went swimming? She didn't, she doesn't know how to swim.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

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How do you stop an assassin? Kill their target

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Why did the armless girl fell off the swing? Because somebody pushed her. Why did se fell again? Because somebody pushed her again.

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A man gets into a joan Battle. He says Lamboguini Mercy your chick so thirsty then his pponent says Shut up Your chick is thirsty beacs yours face looks like a dried orange The man runs away Then the opponent realizes His Girlfrienn just aked Him for some water

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A man sat down Then he stood up

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knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

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How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen my mixtape? It's really FIRE.

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Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

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my names jim haha

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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