What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Lizards are like marshmellows. If you put them in the microwave they blow up.

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How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

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anti-joke teehee

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A cannibal wearing a sport coat, grey slacks, and a pink tie walks into a bar holding a duck in one hand, a chicken in the other, and chewing on a human arm. He is subsequently shot by one of the patrons. There's a concealed weapons law here.

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Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

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2 guys are best friends from birth, one goes crazy and kills the others family and feel hatred towards each other for eternity.

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple

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What's a pirate's favorite letter? R, but they are also fond of the C.

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A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

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66

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96

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Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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if i'm white and you're white, then who took my car keys?

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why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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Miami Heat.

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What did the Nazi call the Jew? Alex.

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What's round and red? A round and red solid.

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was kidding about the wheels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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