Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken decided go get cigarettes and then hang out at a bar. The chicken sitts next to horse, the horse says "Why the sad face?" The chicken justs sitts there, thinking about the insanity that he has caused. "I don't know, is my joke not getting old?" Replied the chicken.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was kidding about the wheels.

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all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

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Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

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Lizards are like marshmellows. If you put them in the microwave they blow up.

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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What is even bigger than an elephant? A gi-ant! (Wait you did say an anty joke right!?)

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A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

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Women deserve equal rights... April fools.

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Why was the man unable to get an erection? Because he was a woman

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

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That's as gay as AIDS.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Q: why did the boy fall off his bike? A: he wasn't very coordinated

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Q. What's large, solid, and full of veins? A. A man or woman who frequently engages in weightlifting and follows a diet primarily based around high protein and low carbohydrate intake

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What's a pirate's favorite letter? R, but they are also fond of the C.

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Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

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The NBA lockout

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

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Why was the black guy good at basketball? He practiced hard everyday.

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Did you hear about the one with the priest, the boy, and the dildo? Yes, sadly I have.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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