I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

Q: Whats Faster than a bullet A: A Jew chasing coin

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

96

What's yellow and has six legs ? A cat. I may be wrong about the color and the legs, I'm color-blind and I can't count.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

anti-joke teehee

A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

What do you call a group of black men jumping off a building? Chocolate Rain

Knock Knock. Who's there? The pizza guy. Your pizza's here.

whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

That's as gay as AIDS.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To kiss my ass

what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

A jew, a catholic, and a muslim walk into a bar. Within minutes, they begin to argue about religion. After a few hours of intense debate, all three left dissatisfied and upset.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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