One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +137

whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock Knock! Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

The white guy did it!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why? Because racecar.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

yo momma is so ugly, she is unpleasant to look at!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Let's make like your mother and walk out on your family during pre-adolescence.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken decided go get cigarettes and then hang out at a bar. The chicken sitts next to horse, the horse says "Why the sad face?" The chicken justs sitts there, thinking about the insanity that he has caused. "I don't know, is my joke not getting old?" Replied the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why can't women drive? Actually, they can as long as they legally acquire a driver's license and have no existing restrictions.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

After a long day on the movie set, Lindsay Lohan decides to go out to a bar. She gets really drunk and high on drugs and some guy takes her back to her trailer and stuffs her muffin.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops